#ok the last one's more sad than funny but let's all have a laugh anyway
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Hello all, remember that one time I lost my mind over a very badly translated french Zelda Encyclopedia ?
Remember how I said there'd be a part 2 ?
Did you think I had forgotten about it ?
Well you're right. I very much did.
But I remembered now, and I am not done screaming. This book personally insulted me, alright ? It pretended to be a useful tool to feed my obsession and was actually only pain.
And fun, I had to admit. Turns out that correcting it with my sister has been perfect enrichement for insane Zelda fans. We sighed a lot and shouted even more.
(But honestly, it's a bit sad how bad the book is. Like, were the translators so rushed that they made it with a bad internet translator and didn't double check ? Or did they just cared so little ?
Ok, my funnier theory is that they paired one guy who was lazy and knew fuck all about LoZ and one guy who was decent at their job... And only let the first guy do the final proofread.)
But anyways, case in point, here are my evidences !
And if you thought last post was long, wait 'til you see how I realized I don't have a 10 pictures limit on computer :]
Firstly, a thing that made me laugh as I saw the pictures I gathered for this very serious case is the clear gradual lack of respect me and my... Research Partner had for the book :
There's a "sticky notes" era, a "pencils 'cause we aren't gonna waste so many sticky notes at worst we'll erase" era, and a "we don't give a fuck anymore get the markers out" era.
Last time I divided the mistakes in three categories, "Lore mistakes", "Translation mistakes" and the dreaded "What the fuck mistakes". They are... Inegal, to say the least, but let's keep this system !
Translation Mistakes
And I mean it in the sense that "the french translation have different names and stuff than the english one and this book ignores them", not in just general translation... Because if you go that way, this entire book is a translation mistake !
But here we go :
Little details, but they left "Koroks" written this way when the french version is "Korogus", they left "Impar" (the character from Twilight princess) when in french her name is, well, Impa, they left "Mia" for the name of the remlit when it's "Miou"...
As you'll see along the way, my research partner got very mad at the book and wrote a lot of funny comments. Here you can see that next to where the book says that the river zoras "become violent", she wrote "not all zora" in all caps, which I find hilarious.
And she's right ! Don't badmouth Echoes of Wisdom Dradd, he's a cool dude !
Here, the book pretends that the kikwis all have sort of teas as their name. English reader, I hear you get offended : "The book is right !"
NOT IN FRENCH IT'S NOT ! Here, kikwis have herbs inspired names, not tea.
Well, I was going to make a joke about "DO YOU REALLY WANT TO DRINK PARSLEY OR BASIL TEA ?" but apparently they exist, so. My bad. Can we still agree that these are not types of tea ? There's tea with parsley, but the parsley is not the tea, right ?
(Just for fun, our kikwis are named : Basil (for basil, shocker I know), Jasmi (for jasmine), Pirsel (for "persil", parsley), Romar (for "romarin", rosemary) and Lorion (probably for "laurier", bay leaf. This one is less obvious so I'm not sure)
So here it's a little worse than the other times because in the text, they used the literal translation of "The Imprisoned" from Skyward Sword, except in the title they used the correct french name, "the banished".
They really said : Here's a description of le Banni ! He's called le Prisonnier.
WHY
Ok so this one is a little funny to me, bear with me alright ?
In Phantom Hourglass, one type of enemies are the Phantoms in the Ocean King temple, right ? Well, Phantom in french (literally AND in Zelda, wonderful) is Spectre.
Alright ? So what do the book say about Phantoms ? That they are Fantômes. Fantôme is a word that is phonetically the exact same as Phantom, see ? But it means ghost. Not phantom.
(I mean, they're synonyms, you know ? So phantom kinda means ghost and fantôme kinda means spectre, but It Is Not The Translation in the game so it makes it worse)
Actually, it was funny, but as I explains it it makes me a little mad. It was one google search away...
URGH and it's just the same thing again, yes technically the literal translation for "Triforce of Power" would be "Triforce de la puissance", but is it what it is in french ? NO, IT'S TRIFORCE DE LA FORCE (strength). I was alright with random characters name getting mispelled, but FUCK THIS ENCYCLOPEDIA, THIS ONE IS LITERALLY IN MULTIPLE GAMES LIKE EVEN IF YOU DON'T KNOW MUCH ABOUT LOZ YOU KNOW THAT AT LEAST
All of these are details, but damn Zelda Encyclopedia, I know I'm insane about these games so maybe it's not that deep, but you're writing for the french fans, THE LEAST YOU COULD DO IS WRITE THE FRENCH VERSION OF THINGS
Whew, ok, this is starting to annoy me I feel, so let's change subject, why not ? Here are the :
Lore Mistakes
There are not a lot of them, but they made me gesture widely at the book trying to form a sentence that, if I had managed, would probably have been "Where the fuck did they get that from ?"
Which means that there's a possibility that it's right, but seeing this bitch's track record, I'm going to assume it's not.
Here are pictures of Kokiris, what is the description ?
"Since they're the Hylians' descendants, they look a lot like them."
Since
WHEN ?
Like, genuinely, help me there. Am I the problem ? Are the kokiris supposed to be descended from the Hylians ? And if they are, where is it cited ? I literally almost completed Ocarina of Time for the second time and cannot remember it being hinted at anywhere. Like yeah, they look alike, but aren't kokiris separate forest spirits ???
The tone of the book also annoy me, like "since they're hylians' descendants", as if it was common sense. SIR I PLAY THESE GAMES SINCE I'M OLD ENOUGH TO HOLD A CONTROLLER WHERE DO YOU GET YOUR INFO FROM
It's making me question whether I'm stupid or if it's just bullshitting me right now !
This one is a graph about the different worlds in LoZ. My problem here is that... Well, firstly, my problem is that there is the Sky and the Skies, but I guess that this is like... TP Sky and SS Sky, maybe ?
The real problem is that between these two categories they put "Minish World".
Minish World ? You mean, like, Hyrule ?
...Ok, I'm jesting, they probably mean Cloud Tops and the Wind Tribe. But in that case... Say that ? They make it sound like all the Minish live in the sky ! Precisely between two versions of the sky !
Are minish angels...? No, better question. ARE MINISH OOCCA ??
This one annoys me greatly for several reasons, but I'm going to be so so brave about it :
As you can see, it's a representation of the LoZ Timeline, with two games highlighted : Link's Awakening and Phantom Hourglass. It's because this is talking about when Link goes in adventures in parallel worlds.
So firstly, fuck Majora's Mask, right ?
And then, the thing I have underlined is saying that those events happened in "both case after Ganon was slayed".
See how they say Ganon and not Ganondorf. See it, 'cause I'm not going to make any comment about it because it's nOT THAT IMPORTANT
Quick reminder : Ganondorf got defeated but Hyrule was left destroyed in Wind Waker (third branch of the timeline). Ganondorf's plans were foiled before he had time to do anything in Majora's Mask (second branch of the timeline).
You know where Ganondorf didn't get defeated ?? IN THE FIRST BRANCH OF THE TIMELINE. THE ONE WHERE LINK'S AWAKENING IS.
Really, why go out of your way to say that if it's Not Fucking Correct ? This book wakes up some kind of ancient wrath in me that should only belong to children whose snack got confiscated in school !
Ok, as I said earlier, there aren't many lore mistakes, but that's good because they are the ones that makes me question my sanity the most. Let's go to the category you're probably waiting for :
What the fuck mistakes
Starting with a tame one, but :
This book is incapable of saying the word "regent". It is literally saying, for both Hilda and Midna, that these "princesses" are the "queens" of their kingdom.
No they're not, they're princesses, you just said so, IT'S NOT THE SAME GODDAMN TITLE !!
So this one almost made it to the translation mistakes, but it's in the 'what the fuck' ones simply because it's so poorly translated that I'm not even sure what they originally meant.
It's talking about Spirit Tracks' Tower of Spirit, and you can read "Sparkling trains are activated thanks to the gathered energy."
Excuse me,
Sparkling Trains ?
My guess is that they're talking about the tracks, but even then, they're not called "sparkling" ? And if they're really talking about the tracks, they're then talking about the Spirit Tracks. You know, the ones the game is named about ?
Then, a question : WHERE THE FUCK DID "SPARKLING" CAME FROM.
In the same style, but this time I simply hated it too much to put it in Translation Mistakes : Remember the Fused Shadows in Twilight Princess ? Well in french, they're called Shadow Shards.
What do they call it here ? "Melted Shadows". Not fused, not shards, I'm losing my fucking mind
As I have written on my sticky note, this one is a very disrespectful one. Ciela, the fairy from Phantom Hourglass, has the same name in french and in english, but somehow they still managed to write "Chiela".
Why is it so disrespectful ? BECAUSE IT SOUNDS LIKE "SHIT" IN FRENCH. SPECIFICALLY, IT SOUNDS LITERALLY LIKE THE SENTENCE "SHIT HERE". CIELA IS A PRETTY NAME, DAMNIT
Actually, it annoyed me so much that I went out of my way to show that thIS BOOK KNOWS HER NAME ! THEY DON'T HAVE ANY EXCUSES !!!
JUSTICE FOR CIELA !! FUCK YOU, FRENCH ZELDA ENCYCLOPEDIA !!!!
Honestly, it's funny to me now that these first pages had sticky notes. Ah, the good time from when I still had a slither of respect for this book...
Here, it just describes every Light Spirit from Twilight princess with animals : "goat, monkey, butterfly, snake". Firstly, they don't look exactly like animals, secondly...
Butterfly ?
I mean, Eldin has always looked like an owl to me ? Ok, the wings are vaguely butterfly-shaped, but it has a body and a face ?
Was Eldin a butterfly all along ? Am I going insane ? (ok yes I am, but reader, do you really see Eldin as a butterfly ???)
Oh ok, so now we just don't translate anything anymore. Remember how this isn't the first time this encyclopedia does that to me. You're right, why bother, I STILL HAVE TO FACT-CHECK THE BOOK ANYWAY, MIGHT AS WELL LEAVE IT AS IT WAS IN ENGLISH.
You know what else we could do ?
Leave actual mistakes in the book ! Let's forget a whole ass word in a sentence ! And why stop at random words ? Let's not proof read the title of the games ! Twillight Princess with two Ls ! What's next, MINISHIP CAP ??
(I said last time I'll never get over it, well, I didn't)
I think on my first post someone commented that the LoZ offical books weren't very accurate to begin with, and I hear that... But I still think there's a difference between accuracy and whatever the fuck this encyclopedia has going on
I spared you (and myself) some longer paragraphs that would have been harder to translate, but I swear to god it sounds like it hasn't been written by a human sometimes ! It's like they just put the whole book through a translator, and then went back to ADD some more mistakes ! I genuinely don't understand how an official product can be that bad !! It is hilarious, but also I want to bite through it sometimes.
I hope at least you enjoyed watching me lose my mind again ! It is fun to share how bad this book is, and I have to admit I had good laughs out of it. We haven't even attacked the items list yet... I'm scared ! But if I find atrocities, I'll report them here too.
(Maybe in like, 6 months, but I will !)
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My neighbour Rúben | Chapter 3
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Masterlist
"Aww, sweetheart. I'm so glad you were able to come" grandma said, giving me a hug.
"I would not miss grandad's birthday for anything in the world."
"Not like your father" he said, also hugging me. The moment my dad knew I was coming back to London, he suddenly had an important meeting to attend and he couldn't join us all to celebrate. "He is a coward. Not being able to face his own daughter..."
"Let's leave that conversation for another day, shall we?" grandma said. "Today is a day to celebrate that she has a new job. C'mon, tell us everything about this Spanish girl. Is she posh? Where is the kid's dad?"
"Yes, share all the gossip with your grandma" grandad laughed, sitting down on his big chair.
"She isn't posh. Everything Lucy has is because she's worked her ass off to get it. Language, sorry."
"Don't worry, darling. Living in the North does that to you" grandma said, making grandad snort.
"We also swear on this part of the country, you know?" he said.
"Whatever" grandma replied, rolling her eyes. "What about the dad? You didn't mention anything."
"She divorced from her husband last year. Well, they actually are still divorcing, there is nothing official. But they went their separate ways a year ago."
"A divorce lawyer getting divorced. Funny" grandad said.
"Getting a divorce is never funny. Especially when there is a child involved. How is she dealing with it?"
"Julia is ok. Her dad also is a lawyer, so she is used to only seeing him from time to time."
"That is so sad... But what happened? Why did they get a divorce?"
"You are so noisy" grandad chuckled.
"I just want to know who is the woman my granddaughter is working for!"
"And knowing the reason why she got a divorce is important because..."
"Because!" she said.
"I don't know why she is divorcing from her husband. We don't know each other that well just yet" I shrugged. Which was a lie. Lucy and I had instantly connected and shared all our dramas with each other.
"Anyway, let's talk about more important things" grandad said before grandma could ask anything else. "You are coming to the game tomorrow, aren't you?"
"It is your birthday present, grandad. Of course I am." He's been an Arsenal fan since he was a little kid, and every time my father allowed it, he would take me to one of their games. Tomorrow they are playing against one of the big ones, Manchester City, and he wants me to go with him. I don't follow football that much, but I always enjoy going to the games and spending some time just the two of us.
"Oh, yes. And Robert is taking his grandson with him too. When was the last time you saw Harry?" grandma asked.
Harry... The grandson of my grandad's best friend, the one they've wanted me to marry since we both were kids, and also the one who tried to kiss me the last time we saw each other, getting a punch on the nose as an answer.
"I can't remember when I last saw him" I lied.
"Well, I'm sure he is looking forward to seeing you" grandma said.
━━━━━━❃━━━━━━
"This can't be your granddaughter!" Robert said when we met outside the Emirates Stadium. "Where did the girl with the pigtails go?"
"Hi" I said. I think I haven't worn pigtails since I was three, but oh well. "Harry."
"Hello" he replied, not meeting my eyes. It looked like what had happened during our last encounter definitely still was in his head. Good. Now he probably knew what happens when someone tells you no and you insist.
"Let's go inside, shall we?" grandad said. "Today is a big day, we'll probably have to wait longer than usual at the queue."
Once inside the stadium, we were seated next to the benches, getting to see the players very close, especially when walking in and out of the tunnel.
"Ah, look at this atmosphere" grandad said. "Those City boys aren't used to something like this back home, are they, Robert?"
"They definitely aren't" he replied, both men starting to laugh.
"But at least they win something" Harry said under his breath. Since he was sitting next to me, I was the only one who heard him.
"Who do you truly support?" I whispered.
"Chelsea. But don't tell my grandad, it'll break his heart."
"Your secret is safe with me. You know I'm really good at that."
"Yeah..." he replied, his ears turning bright red.
The first half of the game was just City attacking and Arsenal trying to defend themselves, somehow making it to the half-time with no goals on any side. As the players started walking towards the tunnel, there was one that caught my attention, one that was arguing with another teammate. Before he disappeared, he looked up, our eyes meeting just for a brief moment, and I could swear I had seen him before. But where? On tv? Online? There was something too familiar about him to be just a complete stranger.
"Penny for your thoughts?" Harry said.
"What?"
"You are completely gone, definitely thinking about something."
"It's just that a City player looked familiar. I guess I've seen him somewhere before."
"Maybe out in Manchester? You live in the same city."
"I don't think these guys and I visit the same places" I chuckled.
"You never know."
"Anyway, I'm going to the bathroom. Grandad, do you want a drink or something?"
"I'm fine. Thank you, darling."
When I made it back, the second half had already started.
"Which player looked familiar?" Harry asked me when I sat down.
"I don't know. A tall one, brown hair. He was arguing with another one that looked tiny next to him.”
"Dias?"
"Uh? Why are you speaking in Spanish?"
"That's his name. Well, his last name. When City came out, he turned around and looked to where we are sitting with a confused look. Maybe he also recognized you."
"Nah, that's impossible. Someone probably insulted him and that's why he looked like that."
I had never met a City player, had I? Someone would have told me, they supposedly are superstars.
The game obviously ended with City winning but just by one goal, and grandad and Robert seemed to be very proud about it. We were still on our seats, waiting until most people had left the stadium, when I found myself looking again at the player from the first half. He was giving some interviews, and the way he was standing while talking, made him look even more familiar. Who was this stupidly handsome man? Because he was handsome. And hot. Very hot. His t-shirt was sticking to his body, letting you see his very defined abs and pectorals. And his arms... His arms were the size of my head.
When he finished talking, he smiled at the reporter before saying goodbye, and it clicked.
"No way" I gasped.
"What?" Harry said next to me.
"Who is he?" I asked, nodding towards the City player.
"Oh, that's the one I told you was looking this way. Dias."
"But you said that's his last name, right? What's his name?"
"Rúben. Rúben Dias."
Rúben. My Chris Evans. The hot neighbour. It was him. He was a fucking football player. And not any player, no. A Manchester City one. And now he was looking at us, at me, trying to figure out why I also looked familiar.
"He's looking at us again" Harry said. "Are you sure you don't know each other?"
"We..." But before I was able to say that we didn't, Rúben was smiling and waving at me. And I was waving back, also smiling. But while he gave me a cute smile, I probably was smiling like an idiot or with the ugliest grin.
"You were saying..."
"I don't know him. I just waved back because..."
"He's hot" Harry said.
"Yes. That's exactly why. Wouldn't you have done the same with a hot girl?"
"Maybe... But are you really sure you don't know each other?"
"I'm really sure, Harry. Stop asking."
"Ok" he said, definitely not believing me.
"Alright kids, ready to leave? I'm starving" grandad said.
"Ready" I replied. Anything to stop Harry from asking more questions, and to stop me from thinking about the fact that Rúben, the neighbour, actually was Rúben Dias, Manchester City player and football star.
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Hi! What are your thoughts on XDH as caregivers?
-🧶
xdiz as caregivers !
genre: fluff
!!! non sexual agere, no cg names used
cg!xdinary, gn!reader
goo gunil 🐹
hes doing his best ok!!
very cautious and careful with you,
because the last thing he wants is for you to get hurt!!!
when you do get hurt, he feels like the worst person alive
immediately panics, and rushes to help you 。゚(゚´Д`゚)゚。
hes the sweetest though,
it takes him a bit to figure out the caregiver thing but he'll get there
he'll do literally anything if its for you
after you sleep he watches videos on things like how to braid hair, how to make cookies, etc
he literally goes down rabbit holes for you
you love it so much so the lack of sleep is worth it for him
kim jungsu 🐱
you think hes the coolest person in the world
only because he can play the piano
whenever he finds out you have a new favorite song, his mission is to learn it on the piano
will definitely give you personal concerts
WITH choreo too ♪( ´θ`)
you'll play along too, trying to get him to complete your hand heart, making signs, etc
and your plushies will also join the fun!!
tried to teach you piano but you just like pressing whatever keys you want
loves holding your hand
loves it even more when you swing your arms back and forth while holding hands
kwak jiseok 🐥
the SILLIEST EVER.
i see him more like an older brother rather than a parental figure (idk how to word this pls understand)
like he'd get so competitive playing video games with you but he'll let you win anyways
he also gets super excited when you open a new toy he forgets its yours LMAO
but yeah he gives total older brother, like hes just playful all the time
(lovingly) teases you (^o^)
sometimes he goes too far by accident but he'll make it up to you with some ice cream and cuddles
he definitely loves to play pretend with you
again hes just super silly, and loves it when you follow along and be silly with him
your ipad is filled to the brim with selfies of the both of you making funny faces
kim seungmin 🦊
idk how you did it but he is absolutely whipped for you
has cuteness aggression because of you
like its bad
he just wants to cuddle you all the time
hugs hugs hugs
he just loves you so bad
you'll catch him staring at you and you just look at him like (-.-) wut
whenever the members are hanging out with you guys,
he gets all serious and makes sure they behave!!
he doesn't want them to be too loud or anything around you thats why
you could get him to buy whatever toy you want
only if you give him plenty of hugs of course
doesn't like letting you do anything for yourself
in a good way, you're just a little baby anyways
han hyeongjun 🐰
he loves to color with you
one time you got sad because his coloring was very neat, unlike yours
after that he made sure to never color inside the lines again
loves to read you bedtime stories
sometimes he'll make up stories too,
he'll get too invested and won't realize that you're asleep already
so patient with you
if you can't decide what you want to eat
he'll stay in the kitchen with you going through the fridge and pantry and coming up with ideas for you to choose from
paints your nails!!! (i wrote abt this btw hehe)
you two try to have movie nights, but your attention span isnt very high..
just ends up with you falling asleep tbh
its okay he'll carry you to your room of course (^ν^ )
lee jooyeon 🐺
takes playing pretend SO seriously
like the both of you will have foam swords in your hands,
and you guys are crawling around the house together so you don't get caught by the broccoli monster (≧∀≦)
you love it tho
he LOVES making you laugh
like he'll do whatever it takes
silly dances, dressing up in a funny outfit
accidentally turned you into a mega prankster
when he pranks his own members, you're usually around so you take from him
obviously since you learned from him he knows its coming
but he will 'fall for it' just for you
the two of you will team up against his members you will die of laughter everytime
he would definitely sing you to sleep
you end up not being able to sleep without him singing,
so he'll record a bunch of lullabies for you, even making songs for you whenever hes away!
authors note: HI ANON!! thank you for sending this in, i lowkey rushed it :< this is my first time doing bulletpoints or anything thats not a full fic so im kind of nervous!! pls send feedback!! i have another request waiting.. i feel bad because it was sent in a few days ago :(( but its also xdiz related so i guess this helped brainstorm!
#mystarsohee#kpop agere#sfw agere#kpop#xdinary heroes agere#xdinary fluff#xdh x reader#xdinary#xdinary heroes#xdinary imagines#cg!xdinary heroes#cg!gaon#cg!o.de#cg!gunil#cg!junhan#cg!jooyeon#cg!jungsu
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I'm getting way too much enjoyment watching how some of Helluva Boss fandom is raving over the popular current theory that stolas is going to die in the series.
Because of the Oops episode and how the skull and cross bones in the smoke clock landed on Stolas and other stuff
I.e.
Having imp assasins in LooLoo Land
Stella
Striker
His lullaby saying that when he’s gone Octavia will be ok and that today could be his last (I could go on a whole tangent about that lullaby it's so good)
Western Energy (that's it)
I'm not saying I want stolas to die but am I also saying it would be funny to watch the fandom go up in flames about it?
Well call me Phineas and Ferb because
Yes
yes I am
You can stop reading here if you want. Under the cut I'm just rambling justifying why I think what I think. there are some jokes and lighthearted critiques, but you know... you have the option to look and give your own opinions :)
I mean I have my grievances with him like I've said in my other post (shameless plug Warning I'm very illiterate in case you haven't noticed) but like I don’t wish death upon him I still like Stolas believe it or not
lol.
In fact I hope stolas doesn’t die and mostly I don’t think stolas is going to die at all frankly. I highly dout the writers/viv/whoever is going to actually kill off stolas mostly because like any time stolas is in danger its so underminded like- ok LooLoo land is mostly a joke (good joke too I like the end where Stolas turns the imp guy into stone good pay off), Stella played for laughs beacues shes making the hit right in front stolas and it doesn’t get paid off till the next season which is fine the seasons are short, Western Energy he was fine like an episode later.
If home boy cant be hospitalized for more than one episode he isn't dying
Granted I will allow some leeway as we don’t know how much time has passed since Western Energy to Oops but it- I don’t think stab wounds and broken arms heal that fast regardless of that :/ if I'm being honest especially if it was a holy weapon just saying.
Even if he did die that brings up a lot of questions like what happens to demons when they die? Are all demons immortal and can only die due to physical damage? are Asmodeus and Beelzebub going to outlive Fizz and Vortex if imps and hellhounds/other demons aren't immortal. Were the 7 deathly sins ever babies like everyone else? If demons are immortal and can live forever and the Ars Goitias can only be killed by angelic weapons that are hard to get, I'm assuming, why do, they need to have children or heirs? Why even have children at all? If angelic weapons can kill demons do demonic weapons exist and can they kill angels or other holy beings?
All this and more on You Can't Answer These Questions at 8
Lol
anyways
but in all seriousness
Here’s the real question
If they did actually kill Stolas, will they bring him back?
Riddle me this batman
there's a very the very real outcome of them bringing stolas back through some magical demonic bs anyway so like it really won't matter. They're not going to have Stolas bite the dust permanently and if they are... respect honestly (the balls frankly).
People will cry, I'll laugh because I'm heartless, he’ll be like resurrected or something, and everyone will be happy or mad idk.
Like it's one thing for Millie to get hurt in the other episodes because there wasn’t a major plot point you know? (and she’s not important) There was no lingering scene on it with sad music. In when stolas got hurt it was this big thing and for him to just be like fine an episode later is like what? How are you going to have this big emotional climax with no emotional orgasm (sorry) afterwards. And like no I'm not letting this go what the heck? You had the whole fandom screeching about Blizto going to sloth just to do nothing with it and put a twist about Barbie and then also have stolas be perfectly fine and dandy the next episode afterwards. Are there no stakes in this show? Like I get that Helluva Boss wasn’t planned in the beginning but like come on... When Viv approves of the episodes does she look back at the other episodes? Is she even there? Is she ok? Is she and everyone else seeing a bigger picture that I'm not? Has she sat down and watched Helluva Boss from the very beginning and watched them from episode one to now? I mean really not just a once over to send it off to youtube I mean really took a good and hard look at the episodes? The way they mix episodic, and story is really messing with me I'm going to go back and watch all the episodes from the beginning just to make sure it’s not me.
I like how I said in my tangent about Hell fire (shameless plug part 2) I said I liked the new episode over all give or take some extremally small nitpicks yet here I am complaining :) guess I'm a liar
soo yeah, I really don’t think they're going kill off their golden child, their best boy, their little botanist boo, their dopamine deficient dandy, their booboo bear, their uwu baby boi, their uke wukey cinnamon roll, their twinky little baby owl, their Boo thang, their stary eyed savant, their sad beige gay, their smoopy woopy do, their snoogum-boogums, their skidamarink a dink a dink skidamarink a doo, their-
ok
I'm done
I'm so sorry
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So this story ( archiveofourown(.)org(/)works(/)56439289 ) probably isn't exactly your style (it's a little??? mean?) but the comments bring up some big npmd tickle headcanon potential. lee!max jagerman bullying nerds into tickling him and then losing his mind with giggles. do you see the vision.....
Honestly, it’s Max Jagerman idc if they get mean with it, he fucking deserves it lol. So so so happy that I’m not the only one writing for this fandom now! Finally, I can partake in the fruits of someone else’s labor & it’s never tasted so sweet!
Came back after reading it & yeah he gets exactly what he deserves. But yeah for everyone here used to my kind of writing, this is definitely more on the intense side (spoiler: he passes out) & it kinda goes into Ruth’s depraved thoughts (if sweat grosses you out maybe skip this one) but I honestly love it, the nerds deserved a lil power trip & Max got a face full of humble pie
But I totally see the vision! I honestly think something like that would be so in character because of how he reacted to the prank. Probably brush it off as “endurance training” or some shit as an excuse. But it would be SO fucking funny for him to double down & harass them more because of their threat for a round 2 & they’re panicking cause oh shit it didn’t work & then Max catches Peter when he’s alone & slams him against the locker & he was just about to apologize & say it was all just a stupid prank & then he hears him say “where were you yesterday?” & Peter’s fucking reeling now because what the hell is he talking about? & Max just continues on like this is a normal conversation “I waited after practice, but you chicken shits didn’t show” & Pete’s too shocked to even talk but that’s ok because Max wasn’t finished anyway “or are you nerds just waiting for me to let my guard down?”
But they all obviously think it’s a trap & don’t trust him as far as they can throw him, but now he’s just always kinda… lingering around their friend group & it’s kinda annoying & sad & they very hesitantly cave just to see what his fucking deal is
But I’ve been wanting to write something very similar to this idea where after the prank goes according to plan aka he doesn’t fuckin’ die, he starts hanging out with them & once he’s not physically & verbally abusing them he’s kinda got this fun himbo vibe, but he’s still a grade A dick that they put up with more out of fear than enjoying his company, & there’s some stuff they just can’t let him get away with so they end up wrecking his shit & he’s just like “wow, I don’t remember the last time I just let go & laughed like that. Thanks guys, same time next week?” Like this mean dumb jock would be having the time of his life & wouldn’t even know this is supposed to teach him a lesson
#asks#anon ask#fic recs#npmd headcanons#hatchetfield headcanon#max jagerman#peter spankoffski#ruth fleming#richie lipschitz#stephanie lauter#grace chasity
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playlist anon back again here's the highlights
Butch 4 Butch - Rio Romeo
I Love You Like An Alcoholic - The Taxpayers
Laplace's Angel (Hurt People? Hurt People!) - Will Wood (you ever see those videos of cosplays where one person is sitting on a chair and the other person is walking around them kinda pushing them around while this plays? Yeah that.)
Baby Hotline - Jack Stauber
Trees II - McCafferty (this is just vibe but I think it makes sense)
Choke - I DON'T KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME (my friend says this is THE timlex song)
505 - Arctic Monkeys ("I'd probably still adore you with your hands around my neck" / "or I did last time I checked")
Milk Carton - Mercy Necromancy
GAHHH sorry im gonna yap about butch 4 butch n more gay shit i hope youdont mind.
this song is SO FUCKING ENTRY 54 TO ME. AUGHGUHDUSHGS.
"My sweetheart's piano is rat filled/And mine is infested with bugs/The music we make is unnatural/But it sounds just like falling in love"
DO YOU GET ME. CAN ANYONE HEAR ME.
"Tomorrow we'll dig through the garbage/And we'll fish out all kinds of neat trash/And when we go back to my apartment/She'll probably kick my fucking ass"
"I sing her songs in my garage/And make her fall in love with me/And once we're done/The sun is gone/We both just sit so nervously/I talk real slow/And speak real low/Hoping she'll lean into me/But we just laugh cause/What was that/We can't take ourselves seriously"
"She makes me go weak in the knees/But I can't let her see me swoon/Or else she will think I am sweet"
IM SICK IM SICK AOAIUAHGU THEY MAKE ME SO SICK.
--
anyways. i love you like an alcoholic
"Cast that first glance: your smile, my veins"
entry 84. it was love at first sight btw. yeah im right it's canon.
"Kissed that first night/And then the rain opened up the sky to get"
RAIN??? LIKE ENTRY 54? 😦😦😦😦
"I need you like I need a broken leg"
adding this cause it's funny
"Some handsome dark stranger/You were standing there on the corner/You had those compelling magnetized/Eyes you must have lost when you got older"
um. what role did alex immediately give tim when they met. yeah
"Seven blocks in, my fingers brushed your hand/I blushed and you laughed/But you seemed a little sad/I ain't one to jump a ship/But I absolutely knew/I was six steps in when I fell into you"
I HATE THEM I HATE THEM I HATE THEM!!!!! /nsrs
--
anyways i listened to laplace's angel (i didn't remember which song it was even if i had heard it bfore. btw no i havent seen those videos sorry 😭😭) and um. kills them with my mind
"Could you take a look at me?/Am I bad, am I bad, am I bad, am I really that bad?/And now we're singing, ooh, whatever you think of me/If you were in my shoes, you'd walk the same damn miles I do"
PARALELLS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"It doesn't take a killer to murder/It only takes a reason to kill"
AUGHGHSH THEY MAKE ME SICK. ALEX FUCKING KRALIE.
"The only ones in need of love are those who don't receive enough/So evil ones should get a little more"
I THINK I HAUVE COVID.
"If you were in my shoes, you’d see I wear the same size as you"
FALLS HITS MY HEAD AND DIES.
--
sorry i would talk about baby hotline but the kind of lyrics it has are kinda hard to "analyze" like im doing with other songs 😭
--
"Cute guy, nice face/Wrong time, wrong place/I knew in a matter of a minute/His face was smashed/His skin was burnt/His shirt was torn in the dirt"
oh. ok then,dies
"I need you more than you need me/You're beautiful and smart and kind/While I am ugly, full of lies" "And I can't be with you anymore/I can't live like this anymore/I can't hold your heart anymore/I need you to go on without me"
.🙁🙁
--
read the lyrics of choke um. yeah i see it. all i have to say is toxic old men yaoi except theyre not old
--
"I'd probably still adore you with your hands around my neck/Or I did last time I checked" "But I crumble completely when you cry/It seems like once again you've had to greet me with goodbye"
.🙁
--
"When you put a knife to my neck/My stomach doesn't fill with dread/It's fill with butterflies instead/And when you threaten to do things to me/I don't scream"
ANON WHEN I GET YOU. /VPOS
anyways. that's it i hope yuo liked me talkig about gay peopel like and subscribe for more!!!!!!
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are you alright? pt.5
pairings: fem!reader x draco malfoy
summary: Draco and y/n take off from their last questionable encounter brushing it off like a crumb to a carpet. The whole ordeal of him standing up Darcy turns into something that makes y/n realise that maybe Draco really is a piece of shit. As she runs her way down the halls of hogwarts, sad, infuriated and confused she bumps into a boy who seems just as confused as she is. Together they help each-other get back at those they both hate most. One being... Draco.
warnings: cussing, make out scene, intrusive thoughts, awkward positions, language, crying... etc
His hands grew impatient, wanting to touch her feather soft hair, be inches away from her face having the freedom to just kiss her whenever he wanted. Wanting to slide his hands anywhere he dreamed of. Wanting to slide his hands slowly up her thigh.
"Draco?" Y/n called for what felt like the hundredth time.
"Mhm, yea?"
"What're you thinking bout hm?" Y/n inquired with a soft smile, which made his heart melt right into the ground.
About you is all. Which is what he wanted to say.
"Hm, nothing." He sighed before letting himself up
"Then your resting face is pretty damn weird." Y/n was disappointed. She just wanted something, anything to happen. But she was too shy to make the first move.
Darcy was applying layers upon layers of lipgloss trying to hide her dry naturally scabby lips. It was quite funny to be fair, seeing her face all scrunched up in front of the dusty mirror.
"Mwah! Mmmwah!"
Oh god. Darcy was practicing her stupid kissing skills. Not like she had anyone to practice them on anyway.
Y/n could physically see Draco flinch and cringe at this making her want to let out a much needed laugh.
"Merlin. I do not want to be near those lips. Ever."
"Well too bad Mr nice guy, it's about time you show up."
Y/n had completely forgotten about standing Darcy up, the amusing thought of Draco entertaining Darcy was all that fogged her mind.
"What the hell? No-!"
"D-draco?" Darcy innocently called as Draco started to give her an awkward stiff look.
"H-hi Darcy.."
Y/n was giggling like a mad woman at this point. The whole situation was a big fat joke to her and she wanted nothing more than to tell Darcy how badly she had fell for this prank.
"So...."
"So.."
"Wanna make out?" "Wanna head out?"
Both Darcy and Draco said at the same time. You can guess who said what.
"O-oh..."
"I mean that's why you invited me here right? To get it on?"
"Well- you see.."
"B-but you made your intentions so clear!" Darcy raged
"I'm going to tell the whole school that Draco Malfoy is a big fat fraud. No one will ever want to see you again!"
Panic began to take over y/n's features. Was Darcy blackmailing Draco?
Y/n could see the shift in expression in his face, and felt a twinge of anger start to arisen within her.
"Wha- Ok. OK fine what do you want?"
Y/n didn't know where this was going, but she somehow didn't like the direction it was headed in.
"A kiss is all cutie pie." Darcy snarled whilst inching closer and closer to his face.
Darcy had whispered something inaudible to Draco making y/n's curiosity bloom further.
Before she knew it, Darcy's hands were laid on Dracos hip bone gently moving up and down. All the while Darcy had been inching closer....and closer... to his face. The funny thing was.. Draco seemed to look as if he enjoyed it?
"Mm- ah-" Darcy had plunged into Dracos pillowy lips giving him a full blown make out sesh. Draco had seemed to be complying pretty well. As if he loved the situation he was put in. Y/n wondered if he thought about her staring at him and Darcy make out. Y/n wondered if that was his kink.
"Merlin, you taste so good Draco." Darcy said between kisses
Both their faces were flushed red, a shine of sweat glistening gracefully on their skin.
Soft moans escaped Draco's wanting lips searching for soemthing between Darcys. As if her lips had the answers to solve world hunger.
"Y-you're so pretty." Draco mumbled under his breath causing y/n's face to go pale.
Y/n grew angry with each moment the kiss got steamier. She wondered why the hell Draco was actually giving her the time of her life with this kiss. One chaste kiss would have been fine, but a whole ass make out session? Wasn't the whole point of this meet to stand up Darcy and make her feel miserable just like all the times she had made y/n miserable? Why was Darcy always on the winning side! Draco really is a piece of shit. Y/n thought
Fuck this.
Sudden rage which turned into sadness over washed her features as she began looking for a nearby exit to get away from this whole ordeal. Each second was torture to her fragile mind. Ripping her slowly at every moment. Each lustful sound which was cohered from Dracos soft lips made y/n grimace in pain. It should've been her to be Dracos first kiss.
After some time of dreaded tears falling softly down her face, she finally found a hatch below her so conveniently placed. She hastily opened it up trying not to cause a ruckus as she slipped through the gap.
Sigh. Finally she was out of the god forsaken arousal filled room.
She didn't know where to go. Just anywhere far away from the tower was fine. So she set foot, running off into an unknown direction, wind tangled up in her hair, her stamina running low.
The run felt like ages, each long stride she took felt no different than the last. It was like she couldn't escape or except the thought that Draco could very much be doing more than just kissing right about now. The thought irked y/n to unsettling degrees.
Thump.
An uncomfortable pounding began to pulse through her head. What the hell just happened?
She looked up glassy eyed at the mysterious boy she'd bumped into.
"Y/n? Are you okay?" The voice cooed
Once she regained her vision, a tall figure with the familiar head of messy hair and a scar, Harry Potter showed up.
"H-harry?" She quickly scrambled to her feet standing up straight.
"What're you doing up in the halls so late?"
"Nothing. Just taking a good old midnight stroll" The situation resembled of the one she had with draco many nights before. It was.... a comforting memory to say the least.
"I see...."
"Well, i wouldn't want to bother your late night... stroll-" Before Harry could finish his sentence, a strong thrash of wind conjured from the window that had sat right beside them, making them collide into an awkward position.
Y/n's body has been placed to straddle Harry's, arms pinning his head down to the floor. The expression on Harry's face didn't help either.
"Y/n!"
"Y/n! Where are you!" Y/n could hear the annoying yet familiar voice of Draco call from a near corner.
This was it. This would be her payback y/n thought menacingly as she began to get comfortable in Harry's lap ready for Draco to walk in at any given moment.
"Do me a favour Harry. Just play along."
----------------------
Bro i'm kinda glad tumblr deleted my last draft cuz if not THIS WEIRD TWIST WOULDNT HAVE HAPPENED like don't ask okay lmao, also tysm for all the love on my previous works!!! i'm so grateful you guys like this series omigoshahsh okay till next time dearest
#draco x reader#draco angst#draco smut#draco lucius malfoy#draco#harry potter#harry potter fan fiction#draco fanfiction#draco imagine#draco fic#draco x you#draco x y/n#dracomalfoy#draco malfoy angst#draconic#fanfic#fanficfion#harry james potter#draco mini series
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ahhhhh sreedie I lost track of tiiiiime I missed an updateeee
but ykw that means?? you get double the amount of blather from yours truly this time around :D
lmao finally sokka is getting some sword training that isn’t zuko hitting him with a stick when he gets his form wrong
sorry sorry but sweaty sokka is making me think of this one tv show where the main character is panicking bc she has to distract this guy and what she decided to say as a distraction tactic is “I feel.. sticky” and I almost died of second hand embarrassment.
anyways sweaty sokka supremacy this boy needs more minor inconveniences to balance out the major inconveniences that bulldoze over his hopes and dreams
honestly I think sokka is coping pretty well given the circumstances
I’m going to expose myself here but when suki finally reunited with sokka I will admit I was physically wiggling in excitement
aw suki your girlhood dreams are about to be pulverised :((
also can I just say I adore you bc you’ve managed to perfectly balance the fact that suki is a teenage girl with what she thinks is a requited crush BUT ALSO she’s a leader and a tactician and is aware of anomalies in her surroundings at all times
slay kovi my new fav
ALSO ALSO I HAD THIS REALISATION LIKE LAST WEEK BUT WE’RE GETTING MORE AZULA WHICH MEANS WE’RE ALSO GETTING MORE CHEN OR CHAN OR CHANG OR WHATEVER THE ZHAOS BROTHER IS CALLED I FORGOT IM SO SORRY
yoooo suki coming in clutch with the gossip besties
SHEN POV SHEN POV SHEN POV SHEN POV SHEN POV SHEN POV ok yeah I’m gonna be Sooo much more annoying about shen than anybody ever was about reho. now your never gonna wanna remarry me :(
shen is more dedicated to complaining about his sore ass than zuko is to self preservation fr
zuko and shen banter that’s actually purposeful verbal attacks but I’ll pretend is banter bc it’s funny >>>
it’s not Actually funny but it’s lowkey hilarious that shen is like “fuck now I gotta be chivalrous and save zuko over myself if I ever get the chance why must I be such a gentleman woe is me” like bestie if you really didn’t want to help zuko you could just.. Not
also I think you’re handling like the racist propaganda of the fire nation about the other nations really well btw!!
lmao not morrak singling sokka out as an instigator for potential mass injury so blatantly
okay sad that sokka is suffering with communication BUT HOPEFULLY when (and I mean WHEN sreedie istg) zukka are reunited he’ll maybe have a better time trying to get zuko to like.. actually fucking talk about how he’s feeling??? maybe?? a girl can dream okay. but also it’s so real to like not be able to open up to people able difficult topics (not that I have anywhere Near the trauma these boys have) just bc you haven’t yet started talking to someone about them and it’s overwhelming to even think where to begin bc it feels like even if you could figure it out it’ll be impossible to actually convey all the nuance of how you’re feeling bc there’s just so much of it
AUNT WU pls sokka enjoy hating on spirit shenanigans I was you to experience some joy
ohoho please PLEASE let quon’s assholery and ambition bite him in the ass P L E A S E sreedie I’m begging
dude not zuko genuinely considering whether he would maintain his pride better by literally shitting his pants. I can’t anymore with this boy
“are you a good person shen”
“not all the time”
WHAT A SLAY ANSWER OMFG HES AN ICON HES A LEGEND HES-
I’m not sure whether to be scared that quon Will be worse than zhao or laugh at quon’s confidence bc there’s no way he’s worse than zhao
quick question sreedie umm how hasn’t zuko lost any teeth yet am I just supposed to suspend my disbelief about how many times he can get punched in the jaw and not suffer some serious dental damage
awww shen you DO care about zuko :3
genuinely living for shen’s belaboured feral pygmy puma dad era that zuko is forcing him to suffer through its glorious
listen all shen needs to do is leverage sokka against zuko?? like literally just bitch at him about how if he gets himself killed then sokka will be distraught and that’s like at least 60% of his attitude issues solved
do I dislike jet? yeah. do I think it’s going to be wildly entertaining to have him along for the journey? yeah.
NOT MORE OF THE FUCKING BENDER SUPPRESSANTS FUCK OFF ohohoho alas quon you are unaware about zuko being bloody superhuman when it comes to this drug
I was going to say something else but now I have forgotten but!! it’s okay bc now I am going to read the second chapter and hopefully I’ll remember it at some point when I’m writing my next comment >:)
I have been thinking of answering your asks for DAYYYYSSSSS but these damn holidays don’t wanna let me DO IT. But don’t worry ex-lover I am here!
Suki & Sokka reuniting is amazing! She is going to be a good influence on him, I feel it in my BONES!
Or he will gaslight her into thinking he is fine & she won’t be able to help with Shiiit….
Sokka hasn’t spoken to ANYONE about what happened to him except Zuko. & even his dad & Bato got the “safe version” so yeah opening up or even beginning to accept that this is a topic he will EVENTUALLY have to find words to communicate is very difficult… for some people it’s impossible. So I do feel bad for Sokka he isn’t an in easy spot.
It’s funny you mention teeth this was like a big convo in the server today so I’m going to go ahead & say zukos teeth are blessed by Agni themselves so they will not break or fall out it’s canon don’t question me.
Shens teeth are not though
I have my hand pressed against the glass window of my house staring across at your house because we don’t live together anymore but I miss you…..
#I’m so sorry it took me so long to answer#I read your asks ALL THE TIME#I giggle#kick my feet#stub my toe#blame you#curse your name#then miss you#then read your ask again#please never stop#even if it takes me a while to answer#it’s honestly just holiday shit that’s being a bitch#like I DONT WANT TO GO SHOPING AGAIN LEAVE ME ALONE#don’t worry#I got you coal#even if you don’t celebrate#I’m still throwing this coal through your window#HUG KISSES AND KICKS#leekie tag#LEEEEEEKKKKKIIIIIII#LEEKS#THE ONE#THE ONLY#LEEKI!!!!!#liab#ITF#ask
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MHA READING EVERY VOLUME EVERY DAY WEEK 3 (15-21)
(Spoilers OBVIOUSLY)
Ok so i've not had the time to read *everyday* this week so i tried reading 15 to 18 in one day 👍 going great. Anyway
It's funny that I decided to watch the last episode of season 7 minutes before i read vol 15 because, the flashback where All might says he will change his fate with his own hand that is happening during the AFO/Iron Might fight is... is happening in vol 15. Like, the coincidence haha
SUNEATER!!! MY GUY!!!! HE'S SO COOL AND POWERFUL!!! I just love this little group of Kirishima, Amajiki and Fat Gum like. One of my favorite team of hero
And Bakugo encouraging Kirishima in his own way 🥹 Bakugo i hate you so much lol also I want to squish Kirishima's face he's so small and cute hahaha
Aizawa spends so much time saying he doesn't care for his students... but he does 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 big softie
You ever read something and you're like "i wish we got more of these characters interacting". I'm speaking about Mina and Kirishima. I would 100% read an entire manga about them
I forgot Himiko and Twice were in the fight with the Shie Hassaikai :D Himiko my giiiirl!!!!!
Everytime a gun appears in MHA i just start laughing. People have quirks and then people have guns
Also i'm so sorry but all the Star Wars references are killing me. What do you mean Mirio's special technique is called The Phantom Menace? Lololol or the city Musutafu is a reference to Mustafar (a planet in the Star Wars universe) like it's just so funny
Let me just say, Overhaul sucks as a villain, but omg his quirk is so cool and so confusing (for me), his design is nice but I HATE THIS DUDE HE SUUUUUCKS His design while he fused with one of his guy is so nasty!!! I love it!!!!
Obviously, Mirio is sooooooooooo cool!!!!! He fought for *5 minutes* ALONE. QUIRKLESS. IM LIKE WOAH. NO WONDER ERI IS GLUED TO HIM AFTER
I REALIZE I FORGOT A LOT OF WHAT HAPPENED DURING THE SHIE HASSAIKAI FIGHT??? HIMIKO TOOK DEKU'S FORM??? HUH???
Ok so Eri's quirk isn't from either her mother side or her father side but a "mutation" of a quirk that was in the family. I always find it weird when parents freaks out about their child's quirk like??? It's hereditary???
A new very detailed close up of Shigaraki's face! He looks less terrifying than the others though
Sir Nighteye laying down in the hospital bed with 20+ tubes linked to machine in his bed looks SO MUCH WORSE than the anime. I find it bordeline gruesome
And now i'm sad because of Sir Nighteye! GREAT. IM HAVING A BLAST (sarcasm)
We finally meet real Camie :D i love her way of speaking, she's confusing so many people
THE UA FESTIVAL!!! YEEESSS!!!! MORE KYOKA!!!! I love this "arc" :D Hound Dog is so funny in this.
(Omg Dark Shadow is playing the cymbal for the festival 😭😭😭💕💕💕💕 i love him so much)
FIRST HAWKS APPEARANCE LET'S GOOOOO I HATE THIS GUY!!! (/j) :DDD He looks so bored. I think it takes him 11 PANELS before he even smiles A LITTLE BIT. This man wants to be *anywhere* but at the ranking ceremony lol I didnt realize how much Hawks just looks BOOOOORED OF everything, but seems to come back online when theres a fight lol i hate SOOOO MUCH THAT HE LOOKS UP TO ENDEAVOR!!! Hawks you deserve a better role model holy shit.
I'm sorry but Shoto looking at Endevor and telling him "nice scar" essentially while the panel only shows *his* own scar while slurping noodles is just funny.
OMG FIRST NAME DROP OF TOUYA IN VOL 21 :OOOOO
SHINSOUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!! HE'S SMILING!!!!!!! THE WORLD IS BRIGHT THE BIRDS ARE SINGING YEEESSSSSS!!!!
Also why does Hawks has to look so cool 😭😭😭 i hate his ass (/lh)
___________
And that's... week 3! I was so late in my reading, i'll try to not do the same for vol 22-28! And after that... only 3 volumes (for October) i might take a small tiny break and read 32-39 closer to december so that...maybe... vol 40 will be out.
Anyway! See you...after I read volume 28
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Me after reading this: …. did she get to keep the weed tho? Or did he take it back?
😅
Evidence planting/tampering really gets my goat 😤😤😤
Anyway lol I love how she was like, oh they’ll know something is wrong bc I didn’t fix my bed 😭 I literally can’t remember the last time I properly made my bed with the sheets all tucked in any everything 😬
Cole wanting to cheat in close proximity to PB had me looking up the good old Hare psychopathy checklist lmao. It’s like when serial killers revisit the scene of their crimes to get a thrill 😵💫
Going to put a cut here bc I’m about to go through all 20 items lol
1.) "excess glibness" or superficial charm? ✅
2.) grandiose sense of self-worth? ✅
3.) excess need for stimulation or proneness to boredom? ✅
4.) pathological liar? ✅
5.) manipulative? ✅
6.) lack of remorse or guilt? ✅
7.) "shallow affect?" ❓
Idk about this one actually…we haven’t rly seen any emotional reactions from him apart from anger, but I also feel like there’s not enough data to make an assessment. We need to make him watch the Lion King and see if he gets sad bc that’s a pretty universal litmus test right? It’s like the death of someone’s dad AND an animal at the same time. Double whammy 😖
8.) callous/lacks empathy? ✅
9.) "parasitic lifestyle"?
I’m going to say nah here but a conditional nah?? bc he’s not really doing his job so much as using his job for its perks so he’s like a parasite… to society??
10.) poor behavioral controls?
Ya he punched a wall haha ✅
11.) history of promiscuous sexual behavior? ✅.
12.) history of early behavioral problems? ❓
Idk/insufficient data
13.) lacks realistic long-term goals? ❓
Maybe?? He has long term goals but idk if they are realistic bc he’s just assuming everything will go his way
14.) overly impulsive? ✅
15.) high level of irresponsibility? ✅
16.) failure to accept responsibility for your own actions? ✅
17.) many short-term "marital" relationships?
The fine print says repeatedly betraying someone in a “long term” relationship counts too so ✅
18.) history of juvenile delinquency? 🚫
I feel like no bc then he wouldn’t have been able to become a cop? Unless he got all that stuff sealed 🤷♀️
19.) I’m going to skip bc I’m guessing he’s never been to prison 🚫
20.) "criminal versatility"?
Maybe? Yes? He prob breaks all kinds of laws as a cop so actually it’s a yes for me dawg ✅
So that’s like 14ish out of 20 and I first I was like wow ok certified bad guy here chain him to a rock and let the eagles eat his guts 😈
But then I was thinking like, I personally believe that psychopathy is more nature than nurture (maybe like 60/40? 65/35?) bc apparently true narcissists are born that way and it’s l “incurable” in the sense that u can’t teach someone how to feel empathy - but they can learn how to mimic it (like how a kid learns to apologize and show remorse out of politeness or common courtesy) and hopefully make the decision to act accordingly irl.
So then I was like oh…and didn’t feel as gleeful about calling him out as a villain bc if he really doesn’t feel empathy what can u do? Lmao 🤣
But then again he does still have the capacity to recognize situations where he COULD show empathy, and he just chooses not to so idk.
I’m going to spare him the eagle treatment tho bc he wouldn’t learn anything from it and it’s bad to leave food for wild animals anyway.
At least he doesn’t put peanuts in his Coke right??
“I’m a virgin. Not a prude. He has penetrated me with his fingers, and tongue,” Poppy retches, but throws her head back laughing. “What?”
I felt this in my soul bc I would also have been like “what’s so funny?” 🤨 tbh I’m still not sure if I get the joke lol (Poppy is laughing either bc of what PB said or how she said it so clinically I’m guessing?? I don’t understand why she thought it was such a riot tho 😭 the description was correct?? 😫😫😫)
PB being like “we need to restrain Poppy before someone gets hurt” was hilarious tho. I feel like she would make a good bounty hunter irl.
WHAT IF Poppy didn’t catch Coleslaw in the parking lot? Would PB have found out on her own? (maybe not that specific incident but something else?)
This didn't take me much to think about, because this is how things originally were going to unfold. This story was loosely based on the song, "White Liar" by Miranda Lambert, in fact...The truth comes out a little at a time is part of the lyrics
Always Wanted to Visit
Summary: What if Poppy didn't catch Cole?
Pairings: Cole Turner X Reader
Rating: mature
Warnings: language, implied sexual assault, mentions of sexual activity, mentions of cheating, 18+ ONLY
Word Count: 2.1K
Series Masterlist
Ask me a What If on any of my series
Poppy throws herself into the booth, panting as she takes a drink of her cocktail, “Why aren’t you dancing? This is your night. You’re last time out as a single and free woman, before you become the future sheriff’s housewife,” you give her a weak smile, and look out at Anna Kate who had already found someone to start dancing with. “Everything okay?”
“Yeah, I’m just tired,” you try to smile, but it doesn’t reach your eyes. “I’m about ready to go. I’d rather be in pajamas watching movies or something.”
“That’s how you want to spend your last single weekend?” Still watching Anna Kate, you nod your head. “Alright, let me get Anna Kate, okay?” You give her a sad nod, leaning over to gather your bag. Checking your phone again. You hadn’t responded to Cole’s text, but normally he would check in on you again. He wasn’t going to.
Cole knew that he had messed up, and all it did was bring you new questions. Questions that had been burning into your mind for a while. You had questioned why someone who seemed to be as sexually frustrated as Cole would want to be with you. It wasn’t just that he knew you wanted to wait, it was the constant pressure for more.
It was that perpetual ask to bring his cock closer to you. He wanted to take a picture of the two of you. Wanted to lay his cock over your mound to see how deep it would go, and then proceed to ask if you wanted to try it out. He never seemed to want to let it rest.
Poppy looks back at you, gathering up Anna Kate as you run outside. You needed air. There was a constant worry that you would never be what Cole wanted you to be, but also that he would never be what you wanted from him. Stepping outside the bar doors, you put your hands on your knees, gasping for air. He violated your one rule.
You had allowed Cole to cross your boundaries way too many times, but this time was different. He couldn’t let it be. Your Mamaw and Papaw were just downstairs. They could have seen or heard, and then you didn’t fix your bed back. They would know, and that embarrassed you to think about that. “I’m gonna throw up,” you answer the second that Poppy and Anna Kate come outside. “I can’t breathe.”
“Cole!” The annoying girl riding on top of him screams. Her ass continues to bounce over him, but with her constant fake porn moans, he can’t even pretend that it was you.
“Shut up,” he grunts. It was bad enough that she was just too much, but him pushing his luck each time was going to bite him in the ass. He enjoyed being close to where you were when he was letting some girl fuck him. It brought him closer to you. Made the scene in his head much more real. “My god,” he groans, and she thinks he’s more into it.
“Yeah! You like that daddy?” she lets out a breathy giggle looking over to you who was having a panic attack. “This why you wanted me to fuck you? You sick fuck.”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
“Isn’t that your precious Peach Blossom?” Cole pushes her to the side, seeing Anna Kate holding your hair back. “She know that you like giving it to girls from behind? Won’t even look at my face. You pretending I’m a virgin?” He growls again, trying to push her to the side. “I haven’t came yet.”
“Shut up!”
She slams herself on him harder. Holding on to the steering wheel, while she smiles at your pitiful little self. Cole was just like every man she knew. Wanted to corrupt some sweet thing. Wanted their perfect little housewife, while they treated their mistresses like their cock sleeves. “You like it rough, huh? That virgin cunt won’t be able to handle this fat cock of yours. Gonna stretch her out, and have a mess to clean,” he lifts her up, shoving her to the side.
You needed him, and he had to make sure you understood that he was only trying to give your body what it wanted. “You say a fucking thing, I’ll have you arrested for possession.”
“Good try,” he throws over a bag of weed onto her heaving chest, and she looks at him horrified. “You asshole.”
“Marijuana is illegal in the state of Georgia. You see how easy that was to plant something on you? Get out of my fucking car, and if you say anything to my future wife, you’re getting locked up, and going to look like some crazy jealous woman,” he waits for her to get out, walking back to her car when he starts running towards you.
His hands smooth over your back, and you stand up quickly, taking a step towards Poppy, and she looks between the two of you confused. “How…how did you get here?”
“Someone called and said you were sick. Is everything okay?”
“Fine,” you answer shortly, reaching towards Poppy’s hand. “We were leaving. Too much to drink.”
“Peach Blossom,” he says softly, taking a step closer to you. Wrapping his arms around your waist, and you don’t reciprocate the touch. You didn’t smell like alcohol. Your sweet little self just can’t handle anything. This was one of the most appealing things to you with Cole. You were innocent in all aspects, and he was the one that was getting all your firsts. The first time you even had alcohol was because of him. Although even tipsy, you just let him taste you for the first time.
“Baby, let me take you home. We can sleep it off.”
“No,” you answer quickly, shaking your head. “No, Umm…I’m going to Anna Kate’s.”
“Well, I’ve got the remedy,” he bites at his lip, kissing behind your ear. “Come on, let me take care of you. We can forget what happened earlier. I can make you forget.”
“I…I hardly ever get to see Poppy, Cole. I want to spend time with them. Please?” Poppy scoffs at you, but Cole does finally step away. Holding his hands up, but still has that stupid charming smile. It was so fake, Poppy wanted to puke. He was disgusting, and Poppy knows something happened. She just wanted to know what.
“Fine. Yeah, it’s good for you to have a girls night out, but if you change your mind,” Cole winks, rubbing his thumb over your knuckles. “I just know how to get rid of your buzz, so you can sleep.”
“Thanks, but I can manage.”
“I love you.”
“Love you, too.”
“Nothing happened?” Poppy takes a swig of Papaw’s stout liquor. She wasn’t ready to quit drinking just yet. Cole brought back too many memories. It stressed her out. Stress made Poppy drink.
“No. Can we drop it?”
“How much of your cunt has he seen?”
“What?” “Poppy!”
“I’m just curious. Has he tasted you? Does he know what you feel like?”
“I’m a virgin. Not a prude. He has penetrated me with his fingers, and tongue,” Poppy retches, but throws her head back laughing. “What?”
“That’s so sexy. He penetrated me with his tongue and fingers. So he’s finger fucked you, and you’ve rode his face? Has his cock ever touched you?”
“I give him blow jobs and hand jobs,” Poppy cocks up an eyebrow at you, and you look away. “He’s…he’s ran his cock through it.”
“What does that mean?” Anna Kate asks, slapping at her sister who was continuing to laugh. You didn’t want to mention what happened tonight, but this wasn’t a lie.
“You know,” you shrug, standing up for some pineapple juice. They wait until you return and Poppy laughs harder. “What?”
“Pineapple juice?”
“It’s a great source of vitamin c, I drink it everyday.”
“Makes that pussy taste sweet huh? So what were you talking about with Cole’s cock. Has he had a condom on for this?” Poppy slowly sips the corn liquor, and you aren’t even sure she knows what is going on. Her eyes glazed over and confused. “Did Cole ask you to drink the pineapple juice?”
“What?”
“You drink almond milk now. Are you lactose intolerant?”
“Poppy,” Anna Kate throws a pillow at her sister. “One question at a time, and what are you talking about?”
“Studies say that almonds and almond milk can make pheromones on a woman stronger. Pineapples or their juice make the pussy taste good and sweet. This is common knowledge. So did Cole ask you to do this?” You stare at her dumbfounded, wishing you could talk about anything else. “Anyways, his pee pee has touched you. How?”
“Well, you know,” she shakes her head no at you, and you look up at the ceiling, “He just ran it through it. You know, the lips. First time I was on my back, and then I was on top of him.”
“A pussy job? You gave Cole Turner a pussy job? Peach Blossom, give it up!”
“It’s almost our wedding night. I can…he can wait.”
Anna Kate and Poppy stand on either side of you as Mamaw zips up the back of your dress. Staring at her antique free standing mirror. You didn’t recognize yourself. You play around with your engagement ring, and you’re positive that this wasn’t how you should feel on your wedding day. There was a text, and you didn’t say anything. A text from some girl that said your fiancé’s cock was the best she had ever had.
You didn’t want to believe it, but there was a picture of her on top of Cole. She was facing the other way, and his eyes were clenched closed. You couldn’t see her face, because she blurred it out. And from the looks of it, this was a screenshot of a video.
If you said something, it would be you admitting to all your fears. This could have been a long time ago. It didn’t have to be recent, but running your hands down your dress, you can’t help but wonder.
“PB and J,” Papaw says, and his smile fades as he walks in. “You look beautiful, baby. But…” your lip trembles as you start to cry. “What did he do?”
“Nothing,” you lie. Papaw and Poppy were so much alike. Both of their fists were tight, as the turn towards you and not your reflection. “Nothing with me.”
“Honey, we can call off this wedding,” your mom didn’t see you much. She was a busy woman, and just let Mamaw and Papaw raise you. “What’s going on?”
“Does this have something to do with him punching my damn wall?”
“No,” fanning your face, you reach for a tissue. “Am I making a mistake?”
“If you go through with this wedding unhappy, yeah,” Mamaw starts, and you reach for her hand, admiring your favorite ring of hers. The reason why you wanted an emerald ring to begin with, and now you have an emerald cut diamond. And you specifically told Cole that when you talked about marriage. “Peaches?”
“I think…I think he’s been cheating on me,” Poppy starts stomping out of Mamaw’s room, and you scream for her.
“I’ll take care of her,” Papaw follows suit, and you cry even harder.
“They’re gonna hurt him!” Mamaw pulls you closer to her, letting you lay on her shoulder, while you sob. You tried to avoid thinking about this, but you were about to change your last name for him, and you couldn’t even trust him. “I don’t want him to get hurt.”
“Why do you think he’s cheating on you, honey?”
“Some girl sent me a picture. I don’t know the number,” Anna Kate grabs up your phone, flicking through your messages. Finding the one, and she dials in on her phone.
“Son of a bitch,” she curses, “That’s…that’s Jessica’s number. The girl that was in the three-year-old room. She was fired because she got a DUI,” you scream on your Mamaw’s shoulder. That girl was invited to your wedding. She was invited to your wedding and she had your fiancé’s cock inside of her.
“What do you want to do?”
“I’m not marrying him,” you couldn’t. You didn’t know what you were going to do past that. But you weren’t marrying him. “Get me out of this dress. Now! I’m driving and I’m not looking back. Bring me Poppy!”
In nothing but your lacy undergarments, you run up to your room, throwing whatever you could in your suitcase. You didn’t have time to think. You just knew you couldn’t stay here, and face Cole everyday. You wanted to get away, and Boston was a place you always wanted to visit.
Masterlist
Taglist: @tis-thedamn-season @marveloustaylortot @pono-pura-vida @sstan-hoe @infatuatedharleys @missusbarnes-rogers @peaches1958 @seitmai @smile1318 @andydrysdalerogers @kittycatcait219 @sarahdonald87 @patzammit @elrw24 @redbloodedgurl @cjand10
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reylo + text posts
#ok the last one's more sad than funny but let's all have a laugh anyway#here for a good time not a long time am i right?#just like ben solo#star wars text post#star wars sequels#rey#kylo ren#reylo#star wars#im obsessed with this format sorry#mine
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asking him how to confess to your crush (him)
⤷ oikawa, suna, bokuto, iwaizumi ; [gn!reader]
TAGS: fluff/crack if you squint, confessions
NOTES: please reblog or i’ll cry
━━ OIKAWA
you can’t miss the momentary look of sadness, but he quickly hides it with a cocky smile
he tells you the cheesiest possible way to confess to someone. he doesn’t even know if it’ll work on not
(he actually hopes it doesn’t, but he can’t just be an asshole and tell you something that clearly won’t work)
but once he realizes that he is the person you like, his mind jumps to several different places all at once
he’s happy but also he can’t properly form words, please bear with him </3
“Oikawa?”
He hummed a response to you, ghost of a smile on his lips. He always liked the way you said his name, even if it was just his family name.
“I have a favor... so there’s this guy that I like, and I wasn’t sure how to tell him. Do you think you could give me ideas?”
You don’t miss the pout on his lips, the way his eyebrows furrow, the hurt in his eyes. If one were to blink, they wouldn’t have missed it. He smiled and laughed, quickly trying to hide how much his heart ached.
People — in reality, only makki and mattsun — had asked you if you had feelings for someone. But you never gave them an answer, just a flustered smile and a shrug.
“Uhm... I don’t know, depends on the person. You can get a bouquet or something, and chocolates maybe?”
A smile lit up your face. He had looked so pained to say it; his nose was wrinkled up a little, one hand at the back of his neck, eyes looking anywhere but you.
“Oh, yeah! That sounds sweet, he might like that. Should I ask him what his favorite flowers are?”
“Yeah.” His heart sunk impossibly lower.
“Got it. So, what are your favorite flowers?”
He looked up from where he’d taken a sudden interest in the floor, looking around for someone else. But no one seemed to be engaging in a conversation with you — actually, he realized it was only you and him in the room.
“No, I meant ask this guy that you like.”
“I just did.”
He doesn’t say anything at first, eyes wide and lips parted. There’s something in his eyes that you can’t quite read. Shock, or was in confusion? There was also an undertone of hurt, like he couldn’t tell if this was some sick joke or not.
“You mean... me? I’m the- you have feelings for me?”
Your heart fell then — of course you’d been nervous to tell him. But with the constant flirting, you were beginning to think that maybe it wasn’t just harmless and playful anymore. That maybe even if it was still done playfully, there was truth behind those words, behind the smiles and the winks he sent you.
“If you don’t feel the same way, it’s fine, I just-”
“No, no, that’s not what I meant. I was just a little surprised is all. I feel the same way, and you’re great, really, I just figured I wasn’t your type.”
“But you are.” You said, heating rising in your cheeks. Nothing could mask the smile he wore, even if he was trying not fight it.
“And you are my type. Guess we’re both lucky, hm?”
━━ SUNA
he is determined not to let you notice how his heart stopped in his chest
he still holds the same disinterested, bored look on his face as always, although he’s unaware you could see right through him
refuses to give you advice on how to go about confessing
in fact, the last thing he wants to do is be around you — he knows you were never his, so he can’t be upset, but it still turns his stomach
tell him before he can find an excuse to leave, or else your confession will be a lot more painstaking due to him dodging any interaction with you
“So uh... if you were to confess to someone you like, how do you think you would do it?” Your voice sounded so sweet, so genuine.
“Why? You have a little crush on somethin’?” He laughed.
“Yeah, actually.”
Oh.
You don’t miss the way his nose scrunches and the look in his eyes. He’s looking at the floor with narrowed eyes, almost as though the floor was the cause of his jealousy.
Well, not his jealousy — he wasn’t jealous, was he?
“Hm,” He hums, and you find him putting back on the same incurious face that he always wore. “I don’t know, elaborate confessions are pointless. Just tell the person how you feel. If they really like you, they won’t turn you aware for being simple.”
“Ah, that’s true.” You smile, though it’s fueled with nervousness. “So, one more thing I gotta say then.”
“Make it quick, I’ve to be somewhere soon.” Suna hates the bitter taste in his mouth.
He knows he shouldn’t care, after all he’s never worked up the courage to spill his heart to you, so he doesn’t have a right to feel like something is being torn — no, stolen — away from him.
“Right. You said simple, so... I like you, and I think you’re really sweet. And you’re funny and you’re so caring, even though you would never admit that. Um, I hope that was boiled down enough for you.”
“You’re kidding right?”
The tone in his voice is almost accusatory, although he doesn’t mean it to be, he just genuinely doesn’t believe you. When had you ever shown interest in him? Not that he was complaining.
“No. But it’s fine if you d-”
“I never said that. If you mean it though, maybe you can tell me the longer version of everything you like about me. Over coffee or something?”
━━ BOKUTO
ok first off, let me stop you right there, because baby boy is gonna get so sad :(
there is no hiding the hurt he’s feeling. he’s always expressive, even though he’s trying to hide it
please stop him there because his mood is only going downhill
actually tells you some elaborate, thought out thing that you assumed was from the top of his head
(although in reality, he’s thought about telling you how he feels on countless times)
but when he realizes that you’re talking about him he instantly does a 180, he looks like he’s in heaven
“Bokuto!” You call his name with a smile. You’ve found you can always get a matching one from him whenever you do so.
And of course he smiles back at you, the same excited look in his eyes as always. “Y/n!”
“I need advice.” You say.
His expression drops into one of worry at your tone. If there was anything that Bokuto hated in this world, it was seeing you upset.
“What is it?”
“I need to know how to tell someone that I have feelings for them.”
And just like that, you can see his heart break through his expression. His eyebrows pin up and he presses his lips into a thin line. You can tell that he’s trying not to show you how bothered he was by that one sentence.
He always was bad at pretending he was fine though. It was clear, if nothing else you could see his watery eyes.
“Oh... uhm. Can I ask who the person is?”
You’re hesitant to say it. But you don’t know why, because his reaction was your final bit of proof that he had feelings for you too. He hadn’t been subtle before, but now it was obvious.
“You.”
“What?” Bokuto said, although the word was breathless.
He doesn’t wait for you to respond to him. Instead, the wide smile he always wore appeared back on his face and he wrapped his arms around you.
Usually, Bokuto’s hugs are tight anyway. They’re filled with a need to be close to you and a need to convey the emotion of ‘you are the only thing grounding me right now’.
But this one was tighter. He buried his face into your neck, but you could hear the smile in his voice when he spoke. “I may have to confess to someone too.”
━━ IWAIZUMI
iwaizumi is a gentleman about it, as much as he doesn’t want to be
if anything, he wants to tell you right then and there about his feelings
but the fact (or rather, the thought) that you’ve taken an interest in someone else is all the evidence he needs to stop himself
the last thing he wants to do it mess with your emotions so he intends to stuff he feelings down to deepest parts of his mind in hopes that they’ll one day disappear
until of course, he realizes that he is the guy you’d been talking about
he gets giddy, believe it or not. he hates to admit it sometimes, but unbeknownst to you, you have so much control over his emotions
“So, Iwa?” You said, and he tried to overlook the cautious tone to your voice.
“Hm?”
“Uh, theres this guy that I kind of have feelings for. But the thing is, I don’t know how to tell him.” You sound nervous.
Iwaizumi assumes it’s from the thought of having to tell this person your feelings, yet he doesn’t realize that said person is him and it’s coming sooner than he’d realized.
He doesn’t say anything in response to you at first. His eyes narrow only slightly, then he takes a deep breath and turns back to you with his usual expression.
“If you’re going to tell them, do something sweet and simple. If you get all extravagant with it, it might freak ‘em out. Maybe... I dunno, buy a little gift and tell them?
He hid it well. The mix of jealousy, regret, and sadness in him was painful, but he clenched his fists and tried not to let his voice crack. If there was someone you knew that didn’t cry, it was Iwaizumi. Yet here he was, doing everything in his power not show how upset he was.
What was he even doing anyway? He was helping you find a lover that was not himself. Not that you even knew that, because in reality he’d never shown to you that he had feelings towards you.
That was something he was regretting a lot now.
“Oh I see, what kind of gift would you like?”
Ouch. As though this couldn’t hurt more. “I don’t know, depends on the person. Ask him, not me.”
“I just did, dummy.”
It took him a few seconds to process that, then another few seconds for the relief and happiness to wash over him. A smile rugged at the corner of his lips.
“That’s cute. You and I can go out somewhere this weekend and I can help you pick something out, hm?”
#oikawa x reader#suna x reader#bokuto x reader#iwaizumi x reader#oikawa headcanons#suna headcanons#bokuto headcanons#iwaizumi headcanons#oikawa x you#oikawa x y/n#suna x you#suna x y/n#bokuto x you#bokuto x y/n#iwaizumi x you#iwaizumi x y/n#oikawa tooru x reader#tooru oikawa x reader#suna rintarou x reader#bokuto koutarou x reader#iwaizumi hajime x reader#haikyuu x reader#haikyu x reader#haikyuu headcanons#haikyu headcanons#oikawa hcs#bokuto hcs#suna hcs#iwaizumi hcs#oikawa
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Scummy, sleazy!Naoya who’s your next door neighbor and you honestly can’t stand him. He’s stomping his feet and slamming shit 24/7, plays his music or tv loud at all hours of the night and don’t get me started on the banchee screaming women that are in and out almost every night. You tried to be nice, asked him to keep it down a little. I mean, he’s not the only person that lives in the building, right? He should just respect his neighbors but you didn’t know what you started by coming to him at 11 at night, banging on his door to “keep it down asshole people are trying to sleep!” Well now, it seems like you’re not getting any sleep because every night, as soon as you’re tucked in and your head hits the pillow, you hear the wet, sloppy sound of Naoya jerking his cock in his room, that just happens to be next to your room and, what’s that? Is he actually moaning you’re name??!! 👀👀
BABE?? YOUR MIND IS JUST—JUST SO BIG JESUS FUCKING CHRIST
Ok, ok, you've forced my hand. I have to write Naoya x chubby fem reader bc my mind is RACING with possibilities
CW: chubby fem reader, misogyny, fatphobia, some bullying, male masturbation, breeding kink, allusions to baby trapping
Jesus christ ok—
Scummy!Naoya is the absolute WORST
Imagine living next door to this bastard as a woman jesus christ
Now let's be clear: Naoya is not a good guy here sksksk he is still an arrogant misogynist who deserves a good kick in the nuts
But... *debby ryan ear tuck* he's still kinda hot sksksk
ANYWAYS yall are neighbors and he's a NIGHTMARE
Always making noise, never listening to your gentle requests to please turn the volume down bc you have to wake up early for work
He just simply doesn't care about you and your stupid problems
I imagine Naoya as this privileged little playboy who lives off daddy's money and has never had to work a day in his life
He doesn't like the apartment he lives in, he thinks it's too cheap and dingy, but again, living off daddy's money so he doesn't really have a say where he lives
He still complains tho sksksk
And he doesn't care for his neighbors
He wishes he could live in a penthouse with a new girl in his bed every night, but nooooooo he has to live in a corner apartment with you as his nextdoor neighbor
Speaking of you: he hates you skskks
He thinks you're so ANNOYING: your smile, your laugh, the baggy clothes you wear when you walk around the apartment complex
He thinks you're a sad excuse for a woman, working and living alone and weighing far more than average
He thinks you're pathetic and he HATES that you love yourself as much as you do
He doesn't go out of his way to speak to you, but if you do interact, he's far less than kind
"You're still single? I'm not surprised, seeing the way you look and the fact that you're as independent as the average man. Maybe if you lost a few pounds and acted like a lady, people would like you more."
He's clearly insecure about himself and just taking it out on you bc you're pretty and nice and sexy and funny and perfect and he can't stand it 🙄💅
But you're unbothered bc you're confident and know your worth and some pencil dick weasel like him can't ruin that 😌
He's still a pain in the ass tho 😒
Always playing his shitty rap music and stupid shows super late and super loud
And then there's the plethora of women who stop by to have screaming matches with him
They wail and cry about how he cheated on them and he always claims that they weren't even dating which makes the screaming WORSE
The sound of slamming doors and thrown objects has become far more common than you would like
One night you've just had enough: you have to be up at 6am and Naoya has been watching TV at full volume for the last two hours and you're DONE
You stomp over to his apartment in your pajamas and bang on his door nonstop until he answers
"What the hell do you—"
"NO," you interrupt, jabbing his chest with your finger. "I'm tired of telling you to quiet down. You're a fucking adult; you need to start acting like one and be respectful of other people. If you don't turn your shit down, I will call the police and get your ass thrown out of this apartment. Don't fucking try me."
You stomp back to your apartment without another word, sending him one last glare before slamming your door shut.
To your surprise, the TV is turned down quite a bit and you're finally able to rest
Naoya can't sleep tho, still shocked by everything that transpired
He's never seen you so angry before, your eyebrows furrowed, lips turned down into the meanest frown he's ever seen, making your pretty plump features look ugly—
Wait
Pretty??
Shit... now that he thought about it, you really were pretty, with your bright eyes and plush frame, looking so soft and delectable. He wondered if you tasted as good as you looked—
WHAT NO WAIT NO HE'S NOT SUPPOSED TO THINK OF YOU IN THAT WAY!! You were just some stupid fat woman that lived nextdoor who shouldn't work so much and instead should spend her time lounging around at home eating juicy fruit in the nude and spreading her legs for him when he came home from work—
OKAY HE'S GOTTA STOP
He's just tired and horny, he doesn't actually like you, it's just that he's not in the right mindset to recognize you for who you really are. He'll go to bed and he'll be back to despising you by tomorrow
But... that doesn't happen 🧍♂️
Naoya keeps thinking about you, how your tank top and shorts hugged your frame so well, how he could see your nipples hardening beneath your shirt and how he had the sudden urge to suck them into his mouth and bite them...
Sooooo... Naoya may not hate you as much as he originally thought...
He doesn't want to admit it, but he actually finds you incredibly attractive
Yes he's a fatphobic piece of shit and thought that you were a slob at first just bc of your size but now he thinks your wide hips are perfect for child-bearing and that the extra fat would aid you during pregnancy pregnancy kink is off the CHARTS for this asshole
Nah but fr, he's starting to peak glances at your curvy body whenever you're not looking
Every time yall meet at the mailboxes downstairs, he's lagging behind so he can watch you as you walk upstairs, your hips swaying, your ass looking like a perfect round peach
He's started coming over to borrow flour or milk, any excuse to see you and admire the way you look in your casual clothes
One time you answered the door in a towel and he had to hide his boner while you got him a cup of sugar he was so tempted to turn things around and be like "why don't you give me some real sugar, babygirl?" Turn this into some kinda porno but he couldn't speak he was so nervous 😓
He's thinking about bending your body in the craziest positions, your rolls squished together and your tongue lolling out of your mouth as he pounds into you, hearts in your eyes as he fills you up for the nth time that night
He's struggling to fall asleep without jerking off at least once before bed
He's thinking about you, obviously, how your back would arch beautifully as he pushes your head down into his sheets and pounds your fat cunt for hours on end
He's sure you'd be so precious in bed, your mean attitude melting away after creaming on his dick a few times, turning whiny and needy, hooking your ankles around him and making grabbing hands at him, silently begging him to come closer
He can practically hear your cute, breathy moans in his ear as he jerks his cock late at night
"Oh my god, Naoya! Fuck me, fuck me!!"
His imagination runs wild as he fucks his lube-slicked hand, imagining it's your pretty chubby pussy taking him instead
He's so wrapped up in his little fantasy of you that he's not thinking about how loud he's being
"Fuck, Y/N! That's it, fucking take it. So good, so fucking good, shit! Gonna fill you up, gonna get you fucking pregnant. Gonna make you my cute little housewife, keep you safe and well-fed—fuck, you feel so fucking good—"
He cums with a groan of your name, cleaning up after basking in the afterglow for a few minutes
There's a knock at his door 😶
He's confused af bc it's like midnight but he goes to the door anyways and lo and behold look who it is, it's the girl he just jerked off to
He's like "🧍♂️ what... what're you doing here?"
"You know I can hear you, right? These walls aren't as thick as you think they are."
His first reaction is embarrassment, but then he sees the outfit you're wearing—an oversized t-shirt that reaches your mid thigh—and suddenly he's glad you heard him
He leans against his doorframe, smirking softly, eyes roaming you as his dick starts to harden once again
"Oh yeah? What're you gonna do about it?"
#ask#smut#naoya zenin#chubby reader#fem reader#naoya zenin x reader#naoya zen'in x reader#naoya zen'in#tumblr stop posting my asks before i finish them challenge#☀️ fics
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Always You | JJK (Five)
Summary: you and Jungkook have been best friends since freshmen year of college, there’s a lot of unsaid feelings and tension but neither make a move. what happens when his friend Taehyung (also your crush) needs a fake girlfriend?
Pairing: Jungkook x Female reader, slight Taehyung x Reader
Genre: friends to lovers, idiots to lovers, slight slow burn, roommate au, college au, SMUT (starting ch2), fluff, angst (in later chapters) slight crack, lots of drama
Word Count: 12.1k
Warnings: Swearing, alcohol consumption, sexual tension (?) sad oc, mentions of sex, kind of over the clothes action, drama, heated dance session lol, slight memory of sex, hair pulling, back scratching, mention of boner, second chances (?)
Notes: Okay, first of all THAT 1st TEASER PIC!!! DID WE SEE THAT? *chefs kiss*. Anyway thanks for comments you guys leave I really love reading them!!! Remember to send an ask if you want to be added to the taglist or just want to chat about the story:) have a great week everyone!
Taglist: @mooniyooni @thisartemisnevermisses @giadalin @kookiebunny097 @cosmosjk @moonchild1 @just-jeon @anpanman-sonyeondan @starlight-night0 @yessii-i @apollukee @mikasaredscarf1 @kaye-rosales @bunnyjeonjk @dyriddle @seagulljk @hass-mich-los @peachy-skz0325 @wonusbitch
© taestefully-in-luv
Previous --- Next
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May
Gloomy: The dictionary may describe it as hopeless and despairing but really it should just be a picture of your sad, sad face.
1 month…yes, one whole month has passed since you last spoke to Jungkook. No text, no calls, no random show ups, nothing. Gloom. Gloom. Gloom. Graduation came and gone so quickly…you walked the stage with your friends minus two but honestly you can hardly remember the event. You tried your hardest to be as excited as everyone else but the feeling of gloom stayed with you.
By the end of the month you finally started accepting he isn’t coming back and right around that time you actually heard from him—Jungkook that is. He sent you a pathetic text that he’s moving out and will be by to retrieve his things. More gloom.
The next couple weeks after that are a blur, you recall the sound of movers throughout your apartment. You didn’t have the courage to speak to him…you didn’t have the courage to even leave your room if you didn’t have to. You were so wrapped up in everything you didn’t even consider that fact that you will have to find a new roommate to cover the other half of the rent.
Every day just dragged on, every day a repeat of the last. Wake up, drown in black coffee, scroll mindlessly through your phone and work your full time job. You called in sick too many days already so you have to go or you’re at risk at getting fired. The same day, every day. The same gloomy fucking day.
Jimin tried to call or text every day to make sure you were like, alive. He apologized over and over for not telling you as soon as he found out about the Taehyung situation but he felt that if Taehyung was going to tell you then it is best it comes from him and not Jimin. You can understand that. He also frequently would show up at your apartment to surprise you but you rarely let him in. You did feel bad though, he’s just trying to be there for you.
Jimin 6:04pm
Please let me in?
Jimin 6:05pm
Well…I have some take out for you babe, ill leave it on the doorstep.
Jimin 6:05pm
Call me sometime ok? Love you
Guilt would consume your body but you just couldn’t deal with human contact right now.
June
Around month 2 you finally felt okay to see people again—your close people that is—aka Jimin was finally allowed in, he made you take a hot bath while he cleaned up for you and made you a proper meal. The amount of instant ramen containers lying around the place was by far one of the grossest things he’s seen. The shit that was growing…he shudders just thinking about it.
He would come over every day after work in the evenings. He left day time babysitting to Trina.
“Girl…all this over a boy?” she would constantly say.
You also tried applying for job after job, but the postgraduation life is harder than you thought…at least for you. Jimin landed a job as a kids choreographer, Trina starts up at one of the local elementary schools as a kindergartner teacher and you? You’re still working at the bakery down the street. You applied for many entry level positions in the marketing field but failed miserably in interviews…which only further discouraged you and worsened your mood.
It was also around this time you decided to finally delete Jungkook off all social media and block his number. You refuse to hear from him at this point…not that he was reaching out or anything. You wonder what he’s up to postgraduation? No, you don’t want to know or care. You considered hanging up a picture of his face on your wall so you could throw darts at it but you decided that was maybe on the crazy side. Taehyung sends you weekly texts, asking about how your day/week is going. He updates you on his life as well, apparently he got the curator assistant position at the museum that he wanted. You still feel hurt over everything but you are happy for him. It’s funny, you feel so betrayed over that but Jungkook is the cause of your gloom.
Every day just drags on, you feel heavy everywhere you go. Even when you’re just at home in bed.
By the end of the month your friends somehow convinced you to go on a date—a horrible date at that.
He was awkward as hell, a bad kisser and would lightly…tap your ass in attempt to be sexy. It was a disaster, you don’t even remember what the two of you even talked about at dinner. You just remember his tongue being horribly shoved down your throat and his weird ass tapping habit.
July
Then month 3 finally came around. A month where the weeks went by breathing became just a bit easier. Yes, any and everything still reminded you of Jungkook but it didn’t hurt as terribly as the previous months. By the end of the month you even agreed to your first real social outing. You are hesitant, but you agreed…
“I don’t know guys…a birthday party? We like, don’t even know the girl?” you frown, nibbling on the flesh of your bottom lip.
You are sitting in the middle of your bedroom floor, clothes piling all around you as you try to decide on what to wear.
“You need to get out babe…plus it’s a friend of a friend, so it’s cool.” Jimin says holding up a rose colored crop top, motioning for you to nod yes or no to his suggestion. You cock your head to the side, deciding what pants to go with it.
“I have to say I agree with Jimin, y/n.” your new roommate Holly chips in, “Since I’ve moved in I don’t think I’ve seen you go out even once.”
“Also a party is the best place to find some easy dick.” Of course that’s what Trina has to offer.
“Yes to the crop top Jimin.” You point your head towards the shirt, “Okay don’t have to call me out like that Holly.” You glare at your roomie, “And Trina, we both know I ain’t ready for no type of dick.”
“So we’re looking for some pussy tonight?” Trina smirks, “Nice.”
You rolls your eyes, a chuckle escaping your lips, “Shut up.” you throw a pair of shorts at her face.
“But seriously y/n…Maybe Trina is on to something…” Jimin sits down next to you, crossing his legs in front of him, “Maybe this is a good chance to like—”
“If you say move on I will literally kill you.” You cut in, “There’s nothing to move on from!” you throw your hands up dramatically. “Taehyung used me, Jungkook wants nothing to do with me. And—”
“Then why aren’t you ready for any type of dick?” Holly puts in her 2 fucking cents.
“Because I don’t want to be associated with any boys! Jimin is the exception.”
“Somehow I don’t feel flattered by that…” Jimin puts a hand on your shoulder.
“When’s the last time you got off?” Trina abruptly asks. You turn your head in shock at her shamelessness.
“Trina!”
“Answer her, I’m curious too.” Jimin squints at you trying not to laugh.
“It’s…” your eyes slide to the side, “It’s been a while.”
Trina shakes her in disapproval, “Damn girl, really? My fingers constantly playing DJ, you know what I’m sayin?” Trina goes in for a fist bump but you just push her hand away.
“You’re gross.” You laugh out loud, and it sounds like music to everyone’s ears.
“I’m just real babey.” She flicks her hair back with a proud smile on her face.
Having these 3 around has no doubt helped you deal with the loss you feel. You feel like you are still mourning the dead. How’s Jungkook even doing? You’re too afraid to ask Jimin. Too afraid that he’s doing amazing without you. He must of realized how much better off he is without you around and that makes you feel small.
“Fine…” you mutter under your breath…Jimin snaps his head to look at you, his sly smile growing as he watches you fiddle with a short mini skirt.
“Fine what?” Trina asks with a smirk.
“Let’s find me some dick tonight.”
“Hell fucking yeah.” Jimin claps his hands together, “Tonight is about you!”
“y/n makes her debut tonight! She’s hot, she’s single and she is ready to mingle!”
You can’t help but giggle, your hands bunching up the material of the mini skirt as you look down at it, making your decision.
“Let me get ready and we can get this night started!” you rush to your feet, all the sudden feeling excited for tonight. You are going to actually do your hair and your makeup—you even shaved. You are definitely breathing easier tonight and you have to take advantage of that!
“Let’s do shots as we wait girlies,” Holly shows a bottle of rum she had hiding behind her back, shaking it in excitement.
“Naughty girl.” Jimin winks, standing to his feet, heading towards the kitchen to grab some shot glasses.
You get ready quickly, but taking your time where it counts. You give yourself a once over in the mirror and you have to say you are impressed. Your black jean mini skirt sits right below your ass, while your tits pop in this rose crop top. You wear short heels, and simple jewelry with just the right amount of makeup that makes your features stand out, and you have to say you would kiss yourself if you could—you look fucking good.
“woooooo” Jimin and Trina whistle out at the same time as they walk back in your bedroom.
“I’d fuck.” Jimin says plainly.
“Same as fuck.” Trina says bluntly as she swallows down a shot.
“Yeah you look pretty y/n!” Holly smiles, not really on the same level of honestly as your other two friends.
You burst into giggles, throwing your head back in approval. “Thanks guys…..Lets fucking do this.” You walk towards Trina and grab her shot glass, and you take the bottle from Holly, pouring yourself a shot.
“Ready to fucking mingle.” You gulp down the rum, the burn only encouraging you, the warmth stinging your entire chest and you couldn’t feel more content.
This house was one of the bigger ones, it was full of people and more people and like, more people. You managed to swallow down 3 or 4 shots back at your apartment and the alcohol is definitely working its magic on you, the world just a little nicer.
The amount of people doesn’t even bother you like it usually would, instead you find yourself barging through the front door and making your way to the dance floor with your 3 friends trialing behind you.
The heat of the living room is already intoxicating you, the amount of bodies rolling and grinding makes you feel loose and free. Before you know it Jimin is pushing a drink into your hands and you hug him gratefully as you begin chugging it back.
“Woah slow down, we have all night—actually fuck it, I like your spirit tonight!” he chuckles lightly, his hands going to your waist, rocking you to the beat of the blaring music. Trina and Holly disappear into the kitchen to grab more drinks while you and Jimin dance to whatever b…t…ah, forget it, you forgot the band’s name.
“Are you having fun?” Jimin slurs out, his eyes barely visible as he laughs at nothing.
“So much fun!” you yell out over the music then you lean down into his ear and whisper, “Thanks so much Jiminie…I know I was a little difficult…”
“A little?” he teases.
Jimin’s eyes travel behind you before they are widening. You notice, of course. You are about to turn your head to take a look at whatever he is seeing when his snaps back to you in panic, his troubled smile growing.
“Let’s go find Trina and Holly, yeah?” he tries to usher you toward the kitchen and you oblige. Too drunk and feeling too good that his odd behavior goes ignored by you.
“Kay!” you smile, hooking your arm with his. “Letsa go!” you say like you’re fucking Mario.
The two of you walk to the kitchen, finding Trina and Holly playing a game of beer pong with two random guys.
“Hello my bitches!” Trina hollers over the thumping bass, as she scores a cup of pong, her other hand on Hollys lower back.
“Wait, gotta use the bathroom, be right back!” you slur into Jimin’s ear, he just nods distractedly as he watches the game, laughter erupting his body for probably no drunken reason.
You walk back into the living room and start heading towards the other side where the bathroom is. The journey to the bathroom is fun, you accidently bump into a lot of people but they don’t seem to mind as they will just drunkenly smile at you and you would smile back in your own drunken daze. You skim the room with a dopey smile on your face, just admiring the crowd. You are shocked with yourself…you missed people and you cannot believe it. You continue to observe when your eyes land on tattooed hands. The hands are grabbing a handful of ass on the dance floor. You know these hands. Your eyes travel from his hands to his strong arms to his face…it is hiding in the nook of some girls neck and you feel like someone knocked the wind out of you. Jungkook.
He is kissing on some girl, no doubt leaving bruises behind from his attack on her neck. His hands cupping this girls ass so tightly, he guides her hips into his. You watch as she throws her head back in pleasure and you see him smirk. All his signature moves. You are left speechless. What could you even say? Why does this hurt? Why does this make you feel fucking sick? Why does it feel like you aren’t supposed to be witnessing this? Well, you know why but god, why?!
“y/n!!” It’s Jimin, jogging up behind you, “Fuck, I was trying to avoid you seeing this…” he admit softly, “I swear I didn’t think he was going to be here tonight…he didn’t seem that interested when I asked him about it…”
“It’s fine Jimin…” you mumble.
“Does it feel weird? Seeing him with this girl…?” Jimin is obviously trying to get you to admit something right now but you are not in the right head space to even give it a second thought.
“Why should it? Plus I’m used to this…she’s just some random girl for one night.” You twirl the ends of your hair between your fingers.
“Oh babe…” Jimin glances down at the ground, “This girl…she…he’s brought her to every party for the last month…” Jimin sounds as sorry as you feel.
The same girl? That’s impossible, you scoff. There’s no way Jungkook is actually seeing someone. But that doesn’t stop your stomach from twisting and turning and making you feel fucking sick.
“What do you mean?” you finally slur out, leaning your frame on Jimin.
“He brings her and they leave together too…” Jimin holds on to you, “I haven’t really asked him about her though.”
“Whatever. Fuck him, right? I won’t let this ruin my night.” You smile coyly, draping your arms around your friend. “Bathroom please.” You pout theatrically, pointing your head towards the bathroom.
“Okay let’s get you peeing in peace.” Jimin laughs, guiding you towards the door.
Once at the door, you knock a couple times to find that it is empty, “I’ll wait for you out here.” Jimin assures you.
Once inside the small room, you bunch up your skirt and pull down your panties, squatting on the toilet. You sigh in relief as you pee, but the relief you feel in your body stops when you recall the way Jungkook held and kissed this random but not so random girl.
Why should it bother you? It’s about time Jungkook got serious! But why did he have to dump you to achieve that? And why did It have to be with someone el…
You reach for the toilet paper, ripping it after a few sheets and wipe yourself as you drunkenly sing a tune. So what? You can easily replace Jungkook too!
You stand up, pulling your panties up and your skirt down and take a long good look in the mirror. Your hair is still intact, your makeup is only a little smeared—quick fix, and your tits are still poppin’. This night is just beginning, you decide. A whole new wave of confidence begins washing over you.
“Ready!” You pounce on Jimin’s back, he stumbles forward while laughing wholeheartedly.
“Should we look for Trina and Holly again? They’re probably still playing beer pong!”
“Sure.” You smile, walking hand in hand with Jimin as you make your way back to the kitchen.
Hours pass and you are now outside on the back porch piss drunk with your 3 friends and a couple new friends. Nick and his pal that you can’t remember the name of—but you remember Nick. He’s really tall and has nice muscles covering his body, his light hair is messy and looks like you would have fun pulling it.
“And that’s why I think aliens are already here bro, like they are probably here at this fucking party bro.” No name friend finishes his point. Nick holds in his chuckle as his drunk friend rambles.
“Totally bro.” Then his eyes land on you. Fuck, were you staring? Oh well, it’s best to get to the point. You two have been making eyes at each other all night and it’s time to make the next move.
“Hey Nick, wanna grab a drink with me in the kitchen?” you inquire with a sly smile.
Jimin’s eyes widen before he’s smirking “Don’t be silly, wrap that willy.”
Trina and Holly laugh at Jimin’s words while you turn fucking red with embarrassment.
“Sorry about him…” You excuse Jimin, but you continue to smile slyly.
Nick grins with all his teeth as he takes your hand and leads you back inside the house. His hand is much larger than yours and you are already imagining what his beefy fingers will do to your vagina. God, what’s his dick like???
You enter the kitchen and you and him walk towards the cooler full of beers, he lets you stand to the side as he goes to grab them.
“Nick!!!!” you hear a familiar voice and you wince. Jungkook stands next to the cooler, his hand wrapped around the girls hand, but he briefly lets go of it to dap up your fuck for the night.
“What’s up bro!” Nick returns the handshake, a wide smile on his face.
They know each other?
“I thought you said you weren’t coming tonight?” Jungkook’s hand goes back to holding on to the girl.
“I wasn’t going to but,” he nods towards you, “Glad I did.” He winks. Jungkook’s eyes follow Nicks nod and when he sees you stand there awkwardly he goes completely pale. Your eyes meet uncomfortably, Jungkook let’s go of the girls hand without a second thought.
“y/n?” he questions with a pained expression.
“You know her?” Nick asks, totally out of the loop.
You shift from one foot to the other, not really sure what to do or say. So you settle for his name. “Jungkook.” It feels foreign on your tongue. Like if you said it 3 times in a mirror a sinister ghost would come to murder you.
Jungkook opens his mouth then closes it then opens it then closes it again.
“Baaaaabe,” the girl next to him whines, “let’s get out of here already.” She says, not even acknowledging your existence.
Jungkook shamelessly eyes you up and down, his shock is very evident as he looks at you.
You can’t help but smile a little, knowing you look damn good.
“Let’s go too, Nick.” You saunter to his side, grabbing a hold of his bicep.
That’s when Jungkook knocks out of daze, his brows crease as he looks between the two of you.
“Wait—you and Nick?” he asks, completely amused.
“Is that a problem?”
“Nope.” Jungkook looks fucking smug as he smiles, his hand going to grab the girls hand again. “See you later?” he asks you. You of all people! “Uh? Probably not?”
“I wouldn’t be so sure of that.” Jungkook winks, turning around to leave as he leads his girl out.
Nick just continues to smile, completely oblivious, “So cool that we all know each other!” he grips on to your waist.
“Wait, how do you know Jungkook?”
“We—”
“Wait, it honestly doesn’t matter. Let’s just get out of here.”
“My place?” Nick breathes into your ear, he pushes your hips into his crotch so you can feel his half hard cock.
“Why are you already getting hard?” you tease, leaning up to kiss his neck.
“Honestly, I can’t stop staring at your tits. And I am imagining all the things I want to do to them.” He confesses hotly.
The uber ride to his place is short, only 10 minutes and it goes by quickly as you two have one another’s tongues down each others throats. His hands traveling all around your body, he even manages to slip his fingers past your panties to feel how wet you are.
“Fuck I can’t wait to get you inside…” his rapid breaths fan across your face as you nibble on his neck.
“Gonna fuck me?” you whisper quietly, not trying to get heard by the Uber driver, but you could also hardly care if he hears you or not, he gets 5 stars.
“Want you to ride me.” He palms his cock through his pants as he imagines you bouncing on his cock for him.
“If you deserve it like a good boy.” You replace his hand with your own, rubbing him ferociously over his jeans. You haven’t felt dick in months and the feeling is driving you absolutely wild, you haven’t felt this needy in a long time.
The Uber comes to a stop, parking in front of an apartment building. He lets the two of you know you reached your destination. You and Nick giggle as you thank him and stumble out of the car as you follow him to his apartment. He would stop every few seconds to plant kisses on your lips and grab your ass with a tight squeeze. He groans and rolls his eyes back as he explores your body.
“Wait til we’re inside,” you breathe out, your voice silky as hell.
Finally, after a short, kiss filled elevator ride later you arrive at his front door. His lips never leaving yours as he pulls out his keys, fumbling with them until he finds the right one.
He pulls away for a second to unlock the door and desperately pushes it open to let the two of you inside. Your lips are already back on his as you two trip into the entry way of the apartment, you walk him backwards, until his back is against a wall.
The apartment is dark besides the living room TV, you take a second to pull back and admire Nick’s fucked out expression, the blue glow of the TV making everything feel surreal.
You dive back in to kiss him, he prods his tongue into your mouth, swirling it around with yours making you moan into his mouth.
“Hi guys!”
Your eyes shoot open, mouth still attached to Nicks. You push your head back, disconnecting from Nick and yank your head to the left where you see a wild Jungkook sitting on the living room sofa, his mouth full of the cereal he is eating. He is wearing the most shit eating grin you have ever seen on him.
“Jungkook?! What the fuck?” You spit out, totally fucking shocked. Like, obviously.
“Hey man…” Nick breathes out heavily, trying to speak properly, “I thought you would be at Vanessa’s tonight?”
“Nah,” Jungkook smiles, “Dropped her off and came home.”
HOME?
“H-Home?” You look between the two guys, what the fuck does he mean by that. This is Nicks place, right?
“Oh you didn’t know?” Jungkook nods his head toward Nick, “Nick here is my beloved roommate.”
“What the fuck…” you mutter under your breath, trying to understand the mother fucking situation. Were you about to fuck Jungkook’s roommate? Are you still going to is the real question?
“Wait, how do you two even know each other?” Nick starts to look antsy, “Don’t tell me she’s one of the girls you’ve fucked…come on bro, leave some for the rest of us.” He chuckles somewhat bitterly.
“No!” you’re quick to say. You begin smoothing out your skirt, then your hair. “We just…”
“y/n is my bestie!” Jungkook grins, putting the cereal down and standing up. He walks forward until he is making a triangle with you and Nick.
“Was.” You spit out harshly, crossing your arms across your chest. Nick just stands there confused as hell, looking between the two of you.
“Anyway, I should get going.” You turn your body to Nick, a look of apology on your face.
“What? We can just go to my room?” he slurs, tugging on his pants uncomfortably, his boner still apparent.
“Sorry, no longer in the mood.”
You pull out your phone to order an Uber when Jungkook takes your phone from you.
“I’m not drunk, I can drive you.” He offers. You push your head back in disbelief, how does Jungkook have the AUDACITY to offer that to you?
“Why the fuck would I want that?”
“So we can…” His eyes slide over to the ever growing confused Nick, “Talk.”
You haven’t spoken to Jungkook in 3 months and today is finally the day you are able to breathe a little easier and he just has to barge back in.
“Like I said,” You snatch your phone back from him, “Why the fuck would I want that?”
Nick shifts around uncomfortably, his eyes darting from you to Jungkook.
“Well, I am gonna head to my room…uh, bye y/n…it was nice meeting you…I guess…”
You and Jungkook both turn your heads toward Nick at the same time, eyes shooting daggers at him.
“Yeah, bye.” Jungkook dismisses his roommate, his jaw clenching.
“Nice to meet you too…”
Nick walks backward until his back meets his bedroom room, he looks at the two of you one last time before turning around to disappear into his room.
“I said, let me drive you home.”
“And I said, why the fuck would I want that?”
“y/n don’t choose now to be difficult.” Jungkook takes a step closer to you, his hands running through his dark, messy hair. His eyes shut in frustration, “I just want to talk to you.”
“And I don’t want to talk to you.” You take a step back, “Plus, how would your girlfriend feel if you took me home?”
Jungkook’s eyes narrow, his mouth setting in a firm line.
“She’s not my girlfriend.”
“Could of fooled me and like, everyone else.” You scoff.
Jungkook bites down on his bottom lip, not knowing what to say. While she’s not his girlfriend she’s also not not his girlfriend. It’s complicated.
“Can I please, just please, can I take you home?”
“No, Jungkook. The fucking audacity,” you scoff again, “You haven’t spoken to me in 3 months,” your voice fucking cracks and you feel like dying. “Don’t start now.”
“y/n…” he runs another frustrated hand down his tired face, “I didn’t mean for it to go this long…” “I don’t fucking care, Jungkook.”
You feel your chest begin to burn, and your eyes begin to gloss over but you won’t cry. You won’t give him the satisfaction.
“I want nothing to do with you.”
You stare at the phone in your hands as you begin ordering your Uber when he yanks it from your hands once again, he hides the phone in his back pocket and you snarl.
“What the hell Jeon?”
“I said I am driving you home so we can talk so that’s what we are gonna fucking do, okay?” he grabs your hand and begins walking you towards the front door. There’s something about Jungkook...you decide to listen. You watch silently as he puts on his shoes and grabs his wallet and keys.
“Okay…” you finally answer, your voice timid.
He said you guys are going to talk but the car ride has been mostly silent save the low radio playing in the background. Maybe it’s better this way, you think. You aren’t sober, that’s for sure but you also don’t think you are drunk enough to handle this properly. You decide maybe that’s also for the best.
“You sir, are a fucking asshole.” You speak up, your fingers playing with the zipper of your purse. The car smells like it always does, his fresh laundry car freshener and you get sucked into a million memories linked with this scent.
“I know.” Jungkook eyes you from the driver seat, you shiver from the running AC and so he turns it down, “There’s a blanket in the back if you want to grab it.”
“No thanks, don’t know where that’s been.”
“It’s clean, I promise.”
Your eyes go wide as you recall his last promise to you…”Just a few days. I promise.”
“Yeah, I don’t actually believe in your promises anymore.” You continue to pick at the zipper of your purse, your eyes never leaving the zig and zag of the material.
“I needed space y/n, fucking sue me.” He groans out, his fingers gripping the steering wheel tightly.
“Oh I wish I could.” You snap back.
You feel your chest burn and tighten again, your eyes slightly watering. You have to force them shut to keep from any tears growing.
“I called and texted you every day.” You whisper, his grip getting tighter on the steering wheel.
“I gave you a few days Jungkook. But I never heard from you until 11 at night one night telling me you are fucking moving out.”
“I know, that was…fucked up, I admit. But I had to do what I had to do and I just wish you would let me explain that—”
“No.” you cut him off, “You don’t deserve to explain anything.”
“You mean so much to me y/n…”
“Don’t.”
Jungkook pulls over on the side of the road, turning off the ignition.
“What are you doing?” you sputter out.
He clicks his seatbelt off his body and turns to face you, “Getting comfortable.”
“Why?”
“Will you look at me?” Jungkook tilts his head towards you, “Will you please look at me?”
“No.” you stay facing forward, your hands folded in your lap.
“y/n…please.” His voice sounds strained and you almost feel bad. Almost, but not quite.
You don’t need this…you don’t need him. Ouch, you feel pain in your chest as you think that…oh, the lies you tell yourself.
“Say what you need to say Jungkook, so you can take me home.” Your face stays neutral.
Jungkook sighs out, feeling almost defeated, but not quite.
“I…I am so sorry.” He finally says.
“About what?”
“Everything y/n.” his voice cracks and somehow you feel satisfied.
“You’ll have to be more specific if you ever want my acceptance”
“I know…the first thing I am sorry for is not telling you about Taehyung. That was…that was wrong of me—”
“No shit, but go on.” Your voice stays steady as you speak.
“I was worried about other shit, I was selfish and it’s taking me a long time to forgive myself…but I’ve thought a lot about it these last few months and—and…”
“Oh? You’re worried about you forgiving yourself? Shouldn’t you be a little more concerned about I don’t know, me?”
Jungkook frowns at your words, because well, you’re right. And he’s getting to that part but you keep interrupting him. But he lets you.
“Yes. I am most worried about you, of course.” He breathes out. “You have no idea what these 3 months without you have felt like…”
“Really Jungkook? If anyone knows its fucking me. I went 3 months without you too. You left me!” you start to lose your composure as you speak, your hands gripping on to your poor purse. “When I was going through a really hard time you straight up left me.” You whisper.
“Please believe me…I had my reasons. It was truly for the best y/n.”
“For the best?” you scoff. “You’re such an asshole.”
Jungkook winces at your words, he knows you mean them and that hurts him even more.
“Can you just trust me?” Jungkook blurts out.
Huh? You shake your head, disappointed he would say something so …well, ridiculous.
“Just stop, Jungkook.” You hesitantly roll your eyes, still shaking your head.
Jungkook licks his lips over and over, trying to figure out his next words.
“I really really,” he begins to lose it, his eyes darting all around the car. “just need you to trust me.” He blinks repeatedly, his eyes not focusing on anything in particular.
You, of course, do not believe your ears. Trust him? How could you possibly trust him?
“I just really…I really had my reasons y/n. And I’m sorry, but I just need you to just trust me, that I had my reasons and that I do care about you.” His voice is shaky and you’re uncertain how to take this information.
“I’m confused…” you begin, you tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. “You want me to trust you? Even after you left me? Even after I ‘threw myself’ at you?!”
“You weren’t in the right head space y/n…you were vulnerable and…and you didn’t actually want me. You just were feeling used and rejected and needed something to make you feel wanted. To feel better. You wanted to use me for that and I couldn’t let you. But how much could I handle? You liked one of my friends, dated him…sort of, even slept with him and I had to be your shoulder to cry on when,” his breathing picks up heavily as he tries to speak, “it doesn’t matter.” He grits out.
You sit there…speechless. He wasn’t wrong, was he? You were feeling lost and rejected and used and you just wanted something or someone to feel better and who better than your best friend? But it’s also his fault you needed things to work out with Taehyung in the first place!
“Jungkook—”
“I’m not done.” He breathes out, his hot breath reaching your skin.
“I needed some space to think. But I realized I couldn’t properly think things through if I saw you every day, so yeah, I moved out. I’m sorry…” He runs a hand through his hair, a light chuckle makes it way past his lips “Then I met Vanessa.”
“I don’t want to talk about your little girlfriend.” You turn to face forward in your seat, your eyes glancing at the stop sign ahead.
“I told you, she’s not my girlfriend. But it is complicated.”
You continue to look straight ahead, your heart racing in your chest. The subject of “Vanessa” making you feel anxious.
“Complicated how?” you gulp.
“Don’t worry about it.” He laughs to himself, you turn your head to look at him.
“Are you serious, Jungkook?”
“We fuck y/n.”
“But it’s more than that right?”
“Yeah…” Jungkook bites down on his lip.
You look at him bewildered.
“Do you like her? Love her?”
You grip your purse in your lap, waiting for his answer. How would you feel if he answers yes? Are you brave enough to endure that answer? And if he says no? should you be happy? Should you feel relieved?
“No.” he closes his eyes, he folds his hands in front of him. “It’s complicated.”
You sign in relief—oh. Relief is the emotion you are feeling. Why? Why should it matter?
“Why are you telling me all of this?” you whisper.
“I want to be friends again, y/n.” he says softly, his eyes searching yours.
This is madness, how the hell could you save this friendship? Your face scrunches up and the first couple of tears slide down your cheeks, you shake your head as they continue to fall.
“You don’t know how this makes me feel…” you cry out. “I don’t even know how it makes me feel.”
You miss him, so fucking much and he’s right here offering himself to you. But you ‘re so hurt.
“y/n…I know I hurt you. But you gotta believe me when I say it is the hardest thing I have had to do…you understand that right? I had to do it…you understand right?” he begs.
“You were so quick to abandon me, Jungkook.” You drop your head into your hands, the tears uncontrollable now.
“I…” Jungkook begins to panic, his own eyes glossing over. “Fuck, I’m so sorry. Please y/n…I can make it up to you.”
“Things would never be the same, you get that right?” you bawl into your lap, your words coming out broken.
“Please baby, I just need you in my life again…” Jungkook admits, his own words choppy. He reaches his hand to touch you, to his surprise you don’t flinch. His hand cups the back of your head and he begins to massage it softly.
“I have missed you so much and nothing I mean nothing can replace you.” He hesitates to continue, “trust me…I have tried.”
You sob into your hands harder, the weight of his words crushing you.
“I’m sorry Jungkook but I…I don’t believe you.”
Jungkook’s eyes widen as he absorbs your words, his mouth falls open in shock. Don’t believe him?
“What—what do you mean? What are you saying?” his panic filled voice makes your stomach churn.
“I reject your offer. Now please take me home.” You lift your head and stare straight ahead. “I’m serious.”
Jungkook face twists into a bewildered expression, he doesn’t believe his ears. You…reject him?
“Wait—”
“I said take me home now.” This time you snap your face in his direction, the cold look in your eyes piercing his very soul.
“Okay.”
Hopeless: the dictionary describes it as without hope ; despairing. But in reality, it’s just a picture of Jungkook’s poor, poor face.
Jungkook parks in his designated spot in the lot of his apartment complex, he reverses in because why the hell not. So extra. His drive home was silent… not even the radio on a low volume keeping him company, just complete silence. He turns the car off but doesn’t make a move to get out, he just continues to sit here in his car and sigh out dramatically every 5 seconds.
He’s so confused and lost on what to do. He bangs his head against the steering wheel a few times just for the hell of it, he just…he didn’t think you would reject him. But honestly? Can he blame you? All he’s done lately is be selfish and mess up over and over again. But he wishes you could just trust him but he also wishes he could just tell you the truth. Maybe then you could understand his position and you wouldn’t be mad at him anymore. But he has to wait.
Jungkook’s head is still banging against the steering wheel when more thoughts of you bombard his mind. His breathing picks up and he starts to sniffle, he doesn’t want to cry but you just…you don’t want anything to do with him. He balls his hands into fists and hit the steering wheel over and over causing the horn to go off a few times but he doesn’t care he’s so upset, he just….
When Jungkook saw you tonight for the first time in 3 months he swears his heart actually stopped. He swears it raced so quickly that it just stopped. He let go of Vanessa’s hand so quickly because he wanted to rush to you and hug you close, he wanted to just feel you. Not having touched your skin for the last 3 months…he doesn’t want to imagine even another day.
A few tears slip past his closed lids, he chuckles darkly as he recalls you and Nick. He thought, wow, the universe is cruel and also hilarious. His fucking roommate? He shakes his head, laughing again but his lips remain downward. He feels so fucking helpless right now. But he deserves this, he deserves to feel this pain. He did this to himself and he’s fully aware of that.
Jungkook thinks of your face, he thinks of your smile, he thinks of your eyes and he cries harder, his tears landing on the steering wheel and sliding down landing on to his lap. Yes, he feels like all hope is lost but he knows he cannot give up. He will win you over again one day. He lifts his head and wipes his tear streaked cheeks with the back of his hand and breathes out steadily.
“y/n…” he whispers to himself. Your name leaves his mouth in frustration. He won’t give up. He can’t.
~~~~
“And they were roommates?!” Jimin shouts, a banana half sticking out of his mouth, Trina gasps and whispers “Oh my god they were roommates.”
“Yeah, it was a total shit show.” You bang your head against your breakfast table. Holly rubs your back as she sits next to you.
“Then what happened?” she pries further.
“Yeah what the hell happened y/n!” Jimin yells out.
“He asked to be friends again…and I totally rejected him. Maybe I was too harsh? He was so sad guys…it makes me think…I might agree to kind of being…friends?”
Jimin shuts his eyes as a frown decorates his face, he places a hand on his hip and he inhales a sharp breath, “Listen…you’re both my friends and of course I want you to be good again…but he hurt you …bad.”
“I know Jiminie, but his reasons…” you bite your lip, “Never mind.”
“Well, I don’t like it.” Trina butts in. “He fucking left you, remember?”
“Yes Trina, I fucking remember—”
“Then fucking act like it!”
“Trina relax,” Holly intervenes. “They have a long history, right? It’s hard to just forget about everything…”
Jimin stands from his chair, hands on both hips. “Fine, if we are doing this…then you better actually try. Don’t half ass shit, if you’re going to be friends then don’t be an asshole to him, don’t make snarky remarks…I know your ass.”
Jimin has a good point, you haven’t actually thought about how you will act.
“I’ll be a good girl.” You raise your right arm to salute him.
“Fucking smart ass.” He rolls his eyes.
“Are we serious right now?” Trina shakes her head, “You moped around for 3 fucking months y/n. You cried every time you even thought of Jungkook…which was a fucking lot.” She points out, “Listen, you stayed strong when you talked to him in the car. Don’t break just because you feel bad for the dude because he’s fucking pitiful. He doesn’t deserve your pity girl. He’s an asshole!”
“Trina, be nice.” Holly says sternly, reaching forward to grab on to Trina’s hand. Trina visibly relaxes and nods her head towards Holly and smiles softly.
You and Jimin share a look. Are they….?
“You…” You slam your eyes shut, Trina’s words ringing loudly in your ears. You know she’s right. “I’ll think about it some more. For now, I gotta get ready for work.”
~~~~
“Doesn’t Hazel look so pretty here?” Adam shoves his phone in your face as he gushes about his girlfriend.
“Yes dude, she’s so pretty.” You deadpan. “Now can you please put the brownies in the oven? We’re low.”
“Wait wait…here’s one of us together at the park.” He nudges his phone in your hands, you roll your eyes but you take it.
The two of them are sitting on a park bench, she’s leaning into his frame and they both have wide smiles on their faces. They seem so in love. And you know they are because fucking Adam reminds you every 20 seconds.
“Their love makes me sick.” Jade walks over, her hands patting down on her work apron, her tone is bland but she still tries to smile. “Like, we get it.”
“Who loves who more?” you begin with a toothy grin, “Adam to Hazel or Lenny to the sugar cookies?” you laugh while pointing at said Lenny stuffing his face with the reject cookies. Jade and Adam chuckle while they stare at him.
“Hey guys, really?” Lenny says with his mouth full. “You know I feel bad when we throw them away.” He pouts, crumbs decorating his lips.
“Lenny I catch you eating fresh ones all the time!” Adam points out.
“Sometimes they’re a little ugly…” Lenny reasons, “So I…”
“You don’t have to explain my guy, you just really love your cookies.” You hand Adam back his phone as you head towards the walk in freezer to take out the brownies yourself. You load up a tray and stick those suckers in the oven.
“You’re useless Adam.” Jade sticks a piece of gum in her mouth and chews obnoxiously “U-s-e-l-e-s-s. Useless.”
“You’re always so mean to me Jade what did I ever do to you?”
All 4 of you shoot your heads up when you hear the bell go off on the door of the bakery, its loud chime signaling the arrival of a customer.
“Oh.” Jade says while popping a bubble. “It’s your usual customer y/n.”
You tilt your head towards the front of the store to get a look at who she is talking about, and yup its him. Your most consistent customer who orders the same damn thing every single day. 2 oatmeal raisin cookies and that’s it.
“Can someone else just take care of him today?” you whine, “I’m not in the mood to argue.”
“You know he’s just going to ask for you…” Lenny says stuffing his face with another cookie.
“God damn it.” You huff out, you grab two gloves from the box on the counter and begin walking towards the front of the store.
You reach the front counter and take in your enemy—you mean, your customer.
“And what do I owe the pleasure Mister Oatmeal Raisin?” you raise a brow towards the man. He’s only a few inches taller than you, his hair is a sandy color today and you hate to admit it looks good on him.
“You know you could just call me by name.” the man sways side to side with a smirk on his face.
“I like Mister Oatmeal Raisin.”
He has been coming to this store for the last couple of months and you two…don’t necessarily get along swimmingly. He complains a lot and is a total smart ass. And you? Well, you’re not much better.
“Well, I’ll have my usual.” He smiles, “And you know the drill, please make sure there is a normal amount of raisins and not a million, I don’t want 8 raisins a bite. But one every now and then.”
You roll your eyes extremely dramatically, pressing the buttons on the screen for his order.
“Sir yes sir.” You salute towards him, “How could I not know the drill?”
“That’s the spirit.”
You spin on your heels and head towards the back to heat up his two cookies. You carefully select one cookie with barely any raisins and one cookie with a million, just like he didn’t want. You cackle to yourself as you place them in the baggy, feeling beyond satisfied.
“How haven’t you gotten fired?” Adam crosses his arms over his chest as he watches you, “And how hasn’t he complained about you? You do this every time I don’t get it.”
“He likes her.” Jade says plainly while scrolling through her phone.
“As fucking if!” you scoff, “He wants nothing but to annoy me!” But you can’t help but smile.
“He literally only asks for you every time you’re in.” Lenny reasons, “but you shouldn’t like him back…he likes the worst cookie on the menu. Sugar is where it’s at.”
You laugh at your coworker while walking back up towards the front of the store, reaching the counter.
“Your cookies!” you hand him the baggy with an evil smirk, “I hope you enjoy them.” You wink.
The man opens the baggy and inspects each cookie and with his own evil smirk he winks back at you, “Are we serious right now?” his sly smile doesn’t leave his face as he begins to complain, “You are such a brat.”
“$4 Mister Oatmeal Raisin.”
He hands you the cash, you put it away quickly and with a wide smile you gesture towards the door for him to leave.
“Min Yoongi.” He shakes the bag of cookies in front of him, “Not Mister Oatmeal Raisin.” He turns around and starts walking towards the door but before he exits he tilts his head to look at you one last time, “See you tomorrow…y/n.”
You feel a harsh blush creep up on your cheeks, or your whole face actually. Maybe your whole body. You feel taken aback he knows your name but then you remember you have a god damn name tag.
“Uh…yeah.”
“See you tomorrow…y/n.” all 3 of your coworkers mock in a deep voice.
“Shut up guys!” you whine into your hands, “Can we please just get back to work!”
~~~~~
A few weeks later
The drive to Jimin’s is a quick 7 minutes but you did take a little detour. You decided to stop at the pizzeria that’s on the way and grab a hot pizza for the two of you.
“Hehe.” You look over to the steamy food sitting in the passenger seat.
Jimin has been such a great friend to you all this time and you feel like you’ve never really thanked him…so, tonight you two are going to have a fun night in—he just doesn’t know it yet.
Who doesn’t love being surprised with food?
You pull up to Jimin’s apartment complex and after driving in circles you finally find a parking spot. You grab your purse, your backpack, and the pizza and make your way up to his apartment.
You knock on his front door a few times but get no answer. Maybe he’s not home? No, you definitely hear music coming from the other side…so, you decide to call him.
“Hello?”
“Jimin~ let me in!” you sing into the phone.
“You’re—you’re here?”
“Let me in already!” and with that you hang up and wait patiently outside the door.
A few moments pass before the door is opening up, when Jimin really registers that it’s you he’s kind of closing the door until only his face is shown through the crack.
“Ummm…yes?”
You quirk a brow at the boy, “What do you mean ‘yes?’ let me in!” you begin walking forward when a panicked Jimin opens the door wider to let himself outside and shut the door behind him.
“y/n…why are you here? Did we have plans tonight?” he looks down at the pizza in your hands.
“Not exactly…” you admit, “But I figured we could have a night in.”
Jimin frowns. Fucking frowns!
“Or not?” you say awkwardly.
You hear some sort of banging on the other side of the door and then it clicks.
“Oh? You have someone over?” you smirk.
“Uhhh…no. Nothing like that.” Jimin’s eyes slide to the side as he tries to think of what to say next.
“Babe—”
“Jimin!”
The door is being swung wide open and your eyes travel from some horrendous toes socks to some tight jeans to a striped t shirt to yes, Jungkook’s surprised face.
“Oh.” You both say at the same time.
You and Jungkook stare at one another for a few moments, neither of your eyes leaving the other when Jimin clears his throat.
“Sorry y/n. Jungkook is already over…” he gives you an apologetic smile.
“Is it just you two?” you ask quietly.
“Huh? Uh, yeah.”
You glance down at the pizza and think to yourself. You and Jungkook may not be friends but you can be civil? Yeah, totally! You can definitely be civil! You already bought this fucking pizza so you and Jimin are going to eat it! And you guess, Jungkook too.
“Okay, let me in.” you start shoving your way past Jimin, you watch as his and Jungkook’s eyes go wide.
“Maybe you didn’t hear him, but I am already hanging out with him?” Jungkook sputters out. He awkwardly moves to the side anyway to let you through.
“I can be civil with you Jungkook. Plus, I don’t want this pizza to go to waste. So let’s eat.” You walk through, nudging the pizza box into Jungkook’s hands, he takes it while looking at Jimin with shocked eyes.
Jimin just shrugs and follows you inside.
“Yeah, let’s eat.” He says nonchalantly.
Jungkook is left at the door with the pizza in his hands as he is left completely dumbfounded. He is malfunctioning.
“Jungkook?” you call out over your shoulder, “Hurry up, I’m hungry!”
“Yeah, Jungkook hurry up!” Jimin smirks, he isn’t totally sure what’s going on but he kind of likes it.
“So what were you guys doing before I got here?” you shove an entire slice of pizza down your throat, the sauce getting left behind on your lips.
“I was teaching Jungkook some of my dance moves…we made a bet that he couldn’t learn the entire routine in 3 times…and—”
“Let me guess, he fucking learned it.” You laugh.
Jimin groans, his head thrown back as he begins nodding his head ‘yes.’
“So annoying! What can’t he do!” Jimin throws the pizza crust in the box and Jungkook immediately picks it up and eats it.
“Pshh, I could name a few things.” You point out bitterly. “But we won’t get into that.”
“Yeah, please don’t.” Jimin pleads.
“I’m curious…what is it you think I cant do?” Jungkook quirks a brow at you and your eyes darken in his direction.
“You really want me to?” you take a napkin and wipe your lips, “It’s nothing nice.” You admit.
“Oh then yes, please don’t.” Jungkook is quick to say.
“Yes, please don’t.” Jimin begs again.
The 3 of you are sitting on the living room floor, maybe only 30 minutes or so has passed by and it’s not too awkward. But it’s not necessarily comfortable either. Jimin looks between you and Jungkook constantly, waiting for someone to crack but neither of you really speak to each other. Both of you really only communicating with Jimin.
“So Jimin, are you going to show me another routine?”
“Why? So you can prove you’re the master of everything again? No thanks.”
“Jimin, maybe you can show me a few steps?”
Jimin smiles awkwardly while Jungkook is quick to burst out laughing. You snap your head towards Jungkook and raise your brows at him.
“Why is Jungkook laughing, Jimin?”
“Umm…” Jimin smiles softly, “You aren’t the most…”
Jungkook laughs harder as he watches Jimin trying to explain.
“Aren’t the most…?” You tilt your head towards the boy.
“C’mon y/n don’t make me say it…” Jimin drags out his words in a whine, he plays with his fingers, looking around the room awkwardly.
“Just say it Jimin.” Jungkook chuckles out.
“If you’re trying to say I’m a bad dancer, we all know that’s not true!” you defend once you catch on, you pout at the boys.
“Well…”
“You have both told me I am a good dancer!”
“Well, you know how to move. But steps…following a routine…that’s different. You aren’t very coordinated.” Jimin finally admits, a sheepish grin on his face.
“He means you can roll your hips but your feet are clumsy as fuck.” Jungkook says, still laughing at the situation.
“Shut up.” You glare at Jungkook.
“No, he’s right.” Jimin begins laughing as well, he looks at you and smiles. Well, if Jimin is saying it…maybe it might be true. It’s not like you didn’t kind of know. But still!
“Fine, whatever. Don’t teach me then.”
Suddenly, Jimin’s phone is going off and he rushes to the kitchen to answer it. You and Jungkook eat your pizza in silence, awkwardly catching one another’s gaze.
“So—”
“Don’t talk to me.” You cut in. Jimin isn’t here so it’s not like you have to be totally social with Jungkook.
“Oh.” Jungkook dramatically slumps his shoulders and pouts. You watch him as he throws a silent fit like the baby he is. “Okay.”
Jimin walks back into the living room looking annoyed, he stands between you two and throws a hand on his hip.
“I have to go down to the front office, there was a mix up in packages…I shouldn’t take too long…” he bites down on his plump bottom lip, “Please be civil while I’m gone. Jungkook…” he looks at the boy then at you, “y/n…” he warns.
“Sir yes sir!” you salute towards your friend with a straight face.
Jimin only narrows his eyes as he looks between you two.
“I’m serious…” he says.
Then he is putting on some shoes and heading out the front door, the soft click making you shudder. You’re alone with Jungkook.
A few minutes pass and you both awkwardly just sit there, sometimes catching the other looking. You finally huff out and accidentally giggle.
“What’s funny?” Jungkook’s curiosity getting the best of him.
“It’s just…I feel like we’re Jimin’s divorced parents and we’re trying to be civil for our child.”
Jungkook stares at you with scrunched brows, then looks away while a chuckle escapes his lips.
“Yeah. You’re right.”
You only nod your head in response. You two go back to the awkward silence.
You aren’t used to this…this awkward and odd silence that lingers between you two. It feels so fucking suffocating you almost wish you were on total talking terms so you didn’t have to endure this shit show.
“You know I could…no, forget it.” Jungkook bites his nails as he speaks, “I…”
“What?” you don’t mean to snap at him, but somehow even talking with an attitude feels better than not talking at all.
“I was going to say…I could teach you some steps…then you could surprise Jimin. He’s been working on a salsa piece…I can teach you some? Then maybe he will stop talking shit on your dancing.” Jungkook laughs awkwardly.
“Wait—he talks shit?!” somehow this doesn’t surprise you in the least.
“Only a little.” Jungkook shows you how little with his pointer finger and thumb. “But uh, want me to show you?”
“I don’t even want to talk to you, you think I want to dance with you?” you raise a brow in amusement. You forget this boy has all the audacity.
“Dancing doesn’t have to have any talking.” Jungkook states with a sly smile.
“So you’re just going to show me the steps?”
“Precisely.”
You don’t know why, but this sounds better than actually speaking and/or just sitting in miserable silence. And maybe, just maybe you have a desire to be close to him.
“You think I could learn in time before Jimin gets back?”
“With me as your teacher? Definitely.” He fucking smirks at you and you can’t help but feel that feeling in your stomach. Not necessarily a bad feeling but a fucking feeling.
Jungkook stands to his feet and extends his hand out to you for you to take.
“Here, stand up.”
Your eyes travel from his hands to his eyes and you blink lazily at him…wait, you’re really doing this? He stares down at you and he smiles softly and it creates a warmth in your chest that you’re trying so hard to ignore. You can’t.
Even so, you hesitantly begin to reach up to grab on to his hand, once your skin touches his you feel it. The burning. You should be used to it but right now, the fire is raging and the heat is almost too much. But you let him close his hand over yours as he helps you up.
You’re now standing in front of one another, in complete silence again. But this time it’s not awkward—no, it’s a different type of tension. Your hand lingers in his, neither of you brave enough to let go of the other. Jungkook looks down at you and you up at him, and you feel a million things. But the number one thing you feel is pain. You slowly pull your hand back and break eye contact with him, your head dropping low.
“Show me already.” You whisper.
“Shh, no talking.” Jungkook quietly demands. “Only speak with your body.” He puts some music on the speakers and smirks at you.
Jungkook steps closer to you and you stay grounded in your spot, you can feel the heat of his body begin to radiate and warm you. One of his hands find yours, he weaves his fingers through your own and puts one hand on your hip, he looks down at you to warn you this is how he will guide you.
“Just follow me.”
“You said no talking Mr.Jeon.” you say almost under your breath as you stare into his eyes. Jungkook rolls his head back with a smirk on his face, he looks at you and nods.
He puts his left foot forward and steps with his right foot in the same place at center, then puts his left foot back again. You try to copy his moves but even with such simple steps you step on his feet. He looks up at you disapprovingly. You only smile at him.
You two continue to try these steps until you finally manage to understand them even just a little bit. Jungkook brings your body closer to his as you two move your hips to the music while following the simple steps. His chest flush against your own, his heart beating so loudly you can feel it. Your heart isn’t any better. You start to finally get the hang of it, the music slowly taking you to another place. Jungkook moves his hips to the beat so flawlessly and honestly? You’re doing pretty fucking good if you do say so yourself.
Jungkook’s grip on your hip tightens as he grinds himself closer to you, you feel lightheaded as you two dance to the song. Your breathing getting just a little heavier and you feel lost and pathetic but you’re too immersed in the dance to care. Jungkook finds his head falling into the crook of your neck, his hot breaths fanning against your sensitive skin and you find your hand skimming up his back until you have a handful of his hair. You lightly tug on his locks and Jungkook quietly groans. You don’t know if you’re even doing the right steps anymore, your feet moving all around the place, but somehow it’s working. You’re still following his lead and you’re sure the dance looks somewhat okay. All you care about is how both of your hips move to the beat of the music and into each other. You two are so in sync its driving you nuts.
Jungkook lifts his head and watches as you close your eyes and he closes his own eyes, his head falling forward, your foreheads close to touching. You feel so dizzy, so light and airy, so fucking great like you’re floating. You can’t help but feel the heat creep up your entire body, you feel sweat start to build as you two move. You tighten your hands around Jungkook’s neck and pull him down impossibly close, until his forehead is touching yours. Your harsh breaths mingling with his. You get dragged into the memory of when he had you pinned to his dorms mattress, you recall how his lips left kisses all along your throat, his hot breath reminding you of the past. You think of how he rolled his hips into you effortlessly then as well, you think of how you scraped your nails down his back as he thrusted into you. God, you need to think of something else but Jungkook is filling your mind.
Jungkook’s breathing picks up again, as does yours. Your memories making this dance that much more sensual. You remember the way Jungkook nibbled on your ear as he let filthy words spill from his mouth when he fucked you. God, you should not be thinking this but his body feels so good. God, you should think of anything…literally anything else. You remember how he held you close much like how he is right now. You two continue dancing to the song that is soon coming to an end. You know exactly how it feels to have Jungkook inside you, moving and stilling. You know exactly what it feels like to come all around his cock. God, you need to stop. You need to slow your breathing. God, you…you…you...he continues to guide you along to the music when you feel something hard poke against you. Oh. Oh. OH. Hard. He’s hard.
Immediately, you pull back and take several clumsy steps backward. You blink at him with wide eyes when you realize that maybe he was recalling the same memories as you. Your wide eyes concerning Jungkook.
“Okay, that’s enough lessons for today.” Your harsh breaths don’t go unnoticed by Jungkook, his own breathing quite unsteady.
“Right.” Jungkook mumbles.
You two stand around for a few moments, just taking in the experience you just shared.
You still feel…how do you feel? You just shared a hot dance with your best friend? Wait—ex best friend? You don’t know. The memory of his body moving with yours, his skin touching your skin, his breaths on your neck, his hair balled up in your hands. God, it felt so good.
But so wrong.
“Umm…thanks.” You finally say.
Jungkook perks up at the gratitude, even if it’s somewhat forced. His frown turns into a small smile and you can’t help but smile back.
“I miss you y/n.” Jungkook instantly regrets it by the look on your face. Your expression turning hard. “Sorry I—”
“No, I miss you too.” You answer honestly. “But this doesn’t change anything.”
“But why not? Do you really not want me in your life for like, ever?”
Jungkook’s questions settle deep within you. The depth they hold…it’s too much. You wonder? Is this anti-Jungkook thing permanent? Or are you just trying to teach him a lesson?
Jungkook rubs his temples as he thinks, he sighs out instead of talking more.
“Not forever.” You finally say. Jungkook looks at you, a sliver of hope flashes across his face.
“But when?” he asks softly.
Yeah y/n. When? You know you both can’t go back to how things use to be but maybe starting over? God, you don’t know what to do! You know someone like Trina will be disappointed you became friends with Jungkook again so quickly, but you know someone like Jimin would be happy his two friends are back to being on okay terms. Why are you trying to please everybody? What do you want?
“Will you ever give up?” you say a little more lightly.
“No…” he says under his breath, his eyes focusing on the TV. “Not until you agree to be my friend again.”
You look at Jungkook with disbelief written all over your face, this boy has the fucking audacity once again. You’re amused though.
“Excuse me?” you say, cleaning your ear out with your point finger. “I didn’t catch that.”
Jungkook looks into your eyes, his eyes are large and doe like and it brings you back to every moment ever that he has given you this look.
“You’re stuck with me until you love me again.” He says more firmly.
“Who said,” you look at him with soft eyes, “That I ever stopped loving you?”
Jungkook smiles, he fucking smiles. His adorable bunny smile that makes your heart race.
“You still love me?”
“Only a little.” You jut your lip out, “I mostly hate you.”
Jungkook only frowns for a second before he is smiling again, “That’s fair.”
The two of you stand in comfortable silence for a few minutes, you sway back and forth wondering what you want to say to him—you miss him, of course but…
“Let’s take it slow.” You finally break the silence. You miss him more than anything and it might be worth it to have him in your life again, “You aren’t going to be a priority in my life anymore.” You crack you knuckles, the sound filling up the room.
“I know,” Jungkook feels his heart twist at your words but at least it’s something. “We can go however slow you want y/n.”
“You are on—”
“Thin fucking ice, buddy. I know.”
You exhale a shaky breath, thinking about how to go about this, “We can text every now and then, I’m not sure I want to hang out with you quite yet.”
“Okay.”
“Maybe a group hang out first…”
“I’d like that.”
Jungkook reaches over to grab your hand but you pull back, “That’s a no from me for the affection.”
Hurt flashes across Jungkook’s features but he softens up as he nods his head. “Noted.”
You wonder if you’re making the right decision. This wasn’t easy, you know? This actually felt quite hard. But somehow you feel like some weight has been lifted off your shoulders, like things maybe just maybe will be okay.
“I won’t push myself on you, I promise.” Jungkook sits back down on the floor, crossing his legs.
“Just be yourself, Jungkook.”
“If I wanted to be myself I would be hugging you right now but that’s apparently off limits.” He jokes.
“One hug.” You open your arms timidly. You feel one hug can’t be too bad?
Jungkook widens his eyes in pleasant surprise. He stands to his feet again and opens his own arms.
“C’mere.”
You watch in disbelief as he grins with his arms wide open, expecting you to go to him! And you do. You fucking do.
His arms wrap around you, he pushes you into his chest and you feel so fucking good. So warm, so cozy. His scent making you feel dizzy again, his warmth causing you to heat up. You lean back and look at his content face, he honestly looks so fucking content. Like, this hug is everything to him. And maybe it is, but you don’t know that.
“Uh, am I interrupting something?” you both snap your heads toward the front door to see Jimin standing there with a package in his hands.
“I can come back later?” he smirks at you two.
“No no no no!” you drop your arms from hugging Jungkook and take a few steps back, “We were just—”
“We made up, Jimin.” Jungkook says calmly with the softest smile you’ve ever seen on him.
“We’re taking it slow!” you rush to say.
“Oh?” Jimin winks, he walks forward until he’s in the living room joining you two. “Does this mean you will be joining us this Thursday at Jungkook and Nick’s place?”
“Huh?”
Jungkook shifts on his feet, “Yeah, uh, me and Nick are having a small get together on Thursday…you can bring whoever you want…but you’re definitely invited.”
“Before I answer that…Jimin how did you not know about Nick and him being Jungkook’s roommate?”
“Listen! Jungkook is always HERE! I never go over there! The few times I was there Nick was never home okay?!” Jimin whines obnoxiously.
“Okay, whatever. And Jungkook, I said—”
“You said group hang outs.” Jungkook pouts.
Oh. You did say that. But this soon? And is she going to be there?
You chew on your lips before answering, “Okay. But I’m bringing Trina and Holly.”
“Oh bro, Trina is not your biggest fan.” Jimin cuts in.
“Yeah, I know how she is I already anticipated that.” Jungkook shrugs, he looks at you with a small smile.
Okay, starting over? Taking it slow? Can you and Jungkook do this? You look between the boys and smile,
“Okay. See you boys on Thursday.”
#bts#bts smut#bts angst#bts fluff#jeon jungkook#jungkook x reader#jungkook smut#jungkook angst#jungkook fluff#taehyung angst
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Haikyu! Characters With A Shy Manager
Inarizaki Players With a Shy Manager
Read Part Two Here
Suna
- Suna is the type to not really care about what’s going on unless it’s fun , funny, or simply involves him .
-A lot of people say he just doesn’t care and is a smoker ? or is just lazy but I believe that he’s just uninterested in things that he doesn’t want to be put in or has no business in. He’s very chill and just goes with the flow.
-he’d accidentally make you laugh
It’d been 3 weeks since you became the teams manager and you had yet to laugh or actually hold a conversation with anyone.
It wasn’t that you weren’t trying you just didn’t know how to keep a conversation going and no one was very funny on the team
well , except for Atsumu and Osuma when they did their sibling things
You sat on the bench as you watched a fight break out “ Osuma why aren’t yer trying “
“ I am “
“ are not “
“ am too “
“ are not “
“ look we all just can’t jump in head first and dive straight into volleyball like you ‘tsumu “
“ well that doesn’t mean don’t try “
“ agh i’m sick of you — shutup“
“ you don’t tell me to shut up “
“ yes I do — now shut yer trap”
you moved to stand as you watched the two boys fight you’d grown use to it and knew not to step in you wouldn’t know how to stop them anyways.
You watched as Kita moved to break them up Aran watching the fight closely trying to determine the winner while Suna moved quickly taking photos at all angles
Everyone calming down while Kita took the two boys away to talk to them leaving you in charge as everyone turned to you
“ what do we do now y/n-san “
“ oh um — “ your eyebrows furrowed in confusion you didn’t know what to tell them to do and the way they were all staring at you some even hovering near you standing over you like your houses fence had you ready to bolt and cry into kitas arms
You felt as your mouth tightened you biting your lip looking for a way to calm yourself down feeling someone stand next to you.
Your body having a chill run through it looking up at the black haired male who stood next to you not making eye contact and looking straight ahead at the men in front of him
He knew not to make eye contact with you knowing he may intimidate you since he was taller than you and simply a lot bigger he knew girls like you — that were shy tended to be afraid of things like that.
They seemed to get in their head and make themselves anxious which is why he was confused when Kita said he found a manager that was perfect to watch over the boys and keep them in line
he just figured Kita used you as a way to make sure no boys would try to flirt with you though that never stopped Atsumu
Even if he knew you were scared he would continue to bug you until you gave an awkward laugh at the situation and ran to Kita leaving the boy to sulk alone
Your eyes came together in confusion as you saw him thrust his phone out in front of you showing a video that he pressed play to
The fight between the two males playing with sound as the camera slowly zoomed in on your face a small smile playing at it as the video ended “ got you “
you looked over to see him smiling down at you happily “ w-wha—huh “
“ i’ve made it my duty ever since you’ve joined the team to figure out when you would smile and I found it — I finally caught it—i’m quite proud of me if I do say so myself “
you felt as a weight had been lifted off your chest your straight line mouth quirking up into a smile before it broke and turned into a small laugh which only grew when you thought about how dumb his actions were
Sunas mouth opening and eyes widning when he saw the bright smile on your face that would show whenever you stopped laughing to breathe
his heart clenching as he moved through his phone trying to find another funny thing to show you
He didn’t want this to end
He really thought you looked beautiful and in this moment he knew he had a crush on his teams quiet manager
Kita
-kita is a leader he has a schedule and only makes time for things that are on it
-he doesn’t mean to make you laugh but his schedule just makes for comedic material
You were standing by the door watching the whole time as the teams captain sat in the volleyball closet finally breaking down
Tears pouring down his face as he set the ball on the ground he had just finished shining. Body shaking as he took a breath
“ k-kita-san are you ok “ your voice hit him fast before he could wipe his tears
“ I-I just — theres “ he took a deep breath as he stared at you
“ A balls missing y/n “ he screeched “ A ball is missing and I can’t figure out if I let someone take it home or if I lost it on accident “
his eyes teared up again “ H-How — I do this every day I don’t know how I lost the ball— how I messed up the count just “ he was pleading with you
“ just please — don’t tell the team we’re missing one — they’ll demote me from captain because I can’t follow a simple schedule “
you didn’t want to but you felt your face break as a laugh ripped through your body that had been bubbling at the surface since the beginning of his speech
“ what — y/n this is not funny I may lose my position“
you laughed harder “ pfft kita-san if you lose your position over a ball I have in my hand right now I will talk to the team myself — no matter if they scare me or not “
his eyes lit up “ y-you have it “
“ yes I do — “
you passed it to him walking over to squat by him as he smiled happily starting to shine the ball “ oh thank god — my schedule may continue — now all I have to do is clean the showers and i’m good to go start practice “
he smiled at you “ y/n where did you find this —- I have to thank you “
you laughed harder “ kita — please there no need“ you smiled at him as you decided to finally sit down next to him turning your bright smile towards him
“ I stayed late last night and helped Aran with his serves so , we used the ball I just brought you —I forgot to bring it back and Aran locked the gym up too fast after we left and I was anxious and scared to ask him to unlock it so I just took it home with me “
you pouted at your words “ i’m actually sorry I didn’t know I was hurting you — I should have sucked it up and asked him “
“ y/n it’s ok I admit my schedule is a bit — but — I thank you for helping me calm down “
he nudged your sad body “ maybe with your help I can stop relying on my schedule all together yeah ? “
you smiled brightly again laughing when you saw his surprised face at your action his face that grew even more confused but interested when you laughed
“ of course i’d love to help you kita — senpai “
he felt as his body went hot and his face grew warm hands shaking at your actions.
He wasn’t sure when it started maybe it began when you initially started helping the team by offering late night volleyball practice to those who need help without all the attention
or maybe it was when you offered your number for those who were too scared to ask questions so, they could text them to you and you would ask for them — even though you’d feel scared yourself and had your hands sweating while you asked
He wasn’t sure but he knew that by the smile on your face that he would always want to see it whenever he looked at you
#haikyuu x s/o#haikyu x reader#haikyuu!!#kita#inarizaki#suna rintarō#suna rintaro headcanons#suna rintarou#suna x reader#suna rintaro x reader#suna headcanons#suna rintaro fluff#haikyuu atsumu#hq atsumu#miya atsumu#osamu x reader#haikyuu osamu#osamu hcs#kita shinsuke#inarazaki#s/o#shy s/o#aran headcanons#aran x reader
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Etsy Store Here l Ko-Fi l Commission Info
Part 1 Here! / Part 2 Here!/ Playlist Here!
* Alright so here are the facts as you know them
* Gojo’s a goddamn player and a homewrecker
* The boy probably has half of Tokyo after him
* Not that you can blame them, that pretty face had you fooled at first too
* The second fact, it that for whatever reason, Gojo Satoru has chosen to play house with a future hopeful sorcerer named Megumi Fushiguro
* Which, through forces outside your control, you have become involved with as well
* And the last fact, was that as soon as this no longer interested him or benefited him in any way, Gojo Satoru would abandon the situation entirely and act like it never happened
* So-
* “(Y/N/N), you look nice today, did you do something new with your hair?” Gojo sings
* - pray tell, why is the school prince is currently sitting on top of your desk, looking at you with those heart eyes
* “Oi what do you think you’re doing?” You ask, a vein threatening to pop on your forehead
* “I’m flirting with you~” he sings, only leaning closer with that all-too-pleased smile
* “I’m pretty sure this is bullying” you reply
* Ever since you’ve started pseudo-parenting Megumi and Tsumiki, Gojo’s been doing crap like this,
* Sometimes he tries to feed you at lunch,
* “Open wide (Y/N/N)~” He’ll sing as he holds out a piece of sushi towards you on some chopsticks
* Only for Megumi to eat it instead
* “Why do you look so sad papa, I thought you said I was your pride and joy”
* other times he’s holding doors open for you
* “Ah here let me-“
* You watch as he walks across from you and opens the door to a random void shrine
* You look at him before sighing and opening your own door to the library
* The other day you mentioned how you didn’t get to try the limited edition Sakura Pepsi and came back to your dorm with a bottle on your desk
* Which would be cute- if the bottle wasn’t half-empty with a note that he’d that said
* “Sorry, I got thirsty on the way back”
* Seriously he’s the worst- and yet,
* You turned away from Megumi and Gojo bickering, hoping he didn’t notice how flustered you were,
* you hid your laugh behind your hand as Gojo jogs to catch up with you, saying he was just trying to predict your needs-
* And you held the half-full bottle of Sakura Pepsi to your chest, keeping it on your window sill
* Because you love him-
* Even though you know he’s just doing all these things to entertain himself instead of out of genuine affection
* Even though these feeling will do nothing but hurt you
* You still love him
* He makes your life feel exciting and fun
* And more than that, underneath that moronic playboy exterior, is a gentle, lonely heart
* A heart that will run away as soon as it knows how you feel about it
* So you mask your budding feelings as best as you can
* Because the only thing you imagine is more painful than knowing your feelings won’t be returned-
* Is not having Gojo Satoru in your life at all
* So you do your best to pretend like nothing has changed
* You act just as indifferent as you always have-
* “Here-“ you push your dessert in Gojo’s direction. “You like sweets right?”
* His smile is so radiant you almost have to shield your eyes
* Well, mostly indifferent anyway
* Not that the self-absorbed moronic prince has seemed to notice anyway
* Too busy focusing on the scrumptious piece of cake in front of him
* Still Gojo isn’t one to be underestimated, he looks to you with a twinkle in his eyes
* “Let’s share it!”
* So far he’s tried twice to have an indirect kiss with you, and he’s missed twice
* He even threw away those chopsticks when Megumi ate that piece of sushi in frustration
* But you know what they say, third times the charm
* You look at Gojo with a raised eyebrow, gaze flicking between the cake and his face
* What, did he imbue some cursed energy so it would explode when you tried to take a bite
* “No thanks”
* Cue Gojo crying as he eats his cake
* He’s really been doing his best lately to earnestly pursue you
* But for some reason, you just don’t get it
* “I like you,” Gojo says as you’re walking side by side on your way back to the dorm after visiting Megumi
* You look back at him, and Gojo feels a blush start to fan across his face
* He finally did it! He finally confessed to you
* And his heart is drumming away in his chest
* You don’t seem to understand the monumental significance of what just occurred because what your mind heard was
* “I {really} like {teasing} you”
* You sigh, your heart skipped a beat, for a second you almost got your hopes up
* There’s no way lady killer Gojo Satoru would ever pick you to be one of his lovers, and if he did it would just be so you could be apart of his personal harem
* “Ok”
* And then you turn around and walk away
* Gojo can’t help but feel like this is retribution for all the times one of his romantic partners has said ‘I love you’
* And he responded with:
* “Why would you do that to yourself?”
* Or
* “Cool”
* At first he thinks it’s a straight-up rejection, but he figures out pretty fast that you just didn’t get it when you keep acting the same as you always have around him
* But don’t get it wrong babe, none of this deters Gojo in the slightest
* “Why are you looking at me like that?” You ask
* You’re both in the library, but only one of you is actually studying
* Gojo’s been staring at you with an oddly fixated gaze
* Honestly it’s got you feeling an uncomfortable heat spreading from your face to your neck
* “I’m not giving up you know”
* Giving up on what?!?
* What’s going on right now!!?
* But Gojo doesn’t offer any more insight choosing instead to finally bother reading the book in his hands
* What a weird guy
* You look down to your own book
* You feel the heat linger on your face and neck
* It’s because he’s always saying crap like that, that you’ve caught feelings for him
* Well whatever, everything fades right? Eventually, Gojo will probably lose interest in you-
* He’s part of a clan do you imagine they’ll find a nice girl from a respectable family for him to marry
* They’ll probably have a few kids who’ll be next in line to succeed him
* And by then he’ll be in such a prominent position that you’ll never see him again
* He’ll just be a memory
* Some boy you had a youthful unrequited love with
* The thought makes your heart clench but-
* “It’s for the best,” you tell yourself
* You’re going in completely opposite directions in life, you couldn’t possibly home for anything more than what you have
* After all your luck probably ran out the second you saw his face
* The most beautiful man you’ll ever see
* “I bet he would be one of those handsome grandpas when he gets older” you snort
* The kind that charms and flirts with young men and women just because he knows the effect he has on them.
* You still can’t believe you fell in love with someone like that
* “What a pain” you mumble to yourself, falling back on your bed
* You feel uncertain, afraid of the future even.
* Maybe a snack will help
* It’s the middle of the night, way past the time you were supposed to go to bed when you see him in the kitchen
* Great the last person you wanted to run into
* He’s just standing there in front of the fridge with the door open
* He hasn’t even turned around to say hi or anything
* “Oi Baka prince if you leave the door open like that every-“
* You stop mid-word, you only need one look at his face to know something is wrong
* It’s not all that uncommon for him to do something like this-
* See the thing is, Gojo knows he’s strong enough that he will get to choose when he dies- he’s not bound by the same pain the other sorcerers are, but-
* Well, he’s still going to die
* No matter how much he thinks he’s like god, no matter how powerful he is,
* He’s still going to die
* And growing up with the power he’s had and the mindset that he’s the strongest
* The realization can be pretty crippling
* He so afraid of the uncertainty that brings that most times he can’t move
* The worst part is it’s never when he’s actively thinking about death, or even when he’s on the job
* It’s always at times like this when he’s just woken up and is oddly hungry and he’ll remember
* “Oh, I’m going to die aren’t I?”
* And then it’s like he’s frozen solid
* What is it he usually tells the victims that enter his domain?
* “Funny how when you can do everything, you find you can’t do anything”
* Usually he manages to unfreeze after some unspecified amount of time, getting through it on his own
* But this time, when he finally escapes from the domain of his inner mind he’s covered in a layer of sweat just like always-
* But he’s not sure why he sprawled across the floor
* Not until his head shifts a little, only to see your face looming over him
* Omgomgomgomgomgomgomgomg
* He’s resting his head in your lap!!!
* Honestly this has been a fantasy of his for a while, to have his head in your lap while looking at the cherry blossoms, and you feed him chocolates and a gentle wind caresses your face
* BUT NOT LIKE THIS
* “Feeling better?” You ask
* Gojo thinks he might combust, he moves to sit up but winces
* He’s got the worst headache, these little episodes of his do typically end with a migraine
* Your hand feels nice and cold as it rests against his forehead
* “Rest a little longer, we’re not in any hurry”
* Aaaaand now he’s screaming on the inside again
* “Sorry about this” he mumbles, and you can’t help but smile
* It’s oddly endearing to see a shy Gojo Satoru
* “I bet your lovers would kill me if they saw knew you were showing me such a cute side” you’re half-joking when you say it, but you’re also half-serious
* It gives your Ego a little boost to know you’ve seen a side of him that most of his lovers probably haven’t
* You doubt the mighty Gojo Satoru ever allows himself to be this vulnerable, not even while he’s in the throes of passion
* So that same earnest look on his face startles you
* “I don’t have any other lovers”
* You snort
* “Sure, and I definitely didn’t steal Geto’s pudding that he was saving”
* “I’m being serious”
* Gojo sighs, here he is feeling awfully vulnerable and you still seem denser than a rock
* Do you think he would let anyone other than you see him like this
* “When are you going to realize that if it’s not you then it’s just no good?”
* Your heart is drumming in your ears, and you wonder if he can hear it
* Your mind is telling you to pull back, that this is way too good to be true, that this will only hurt you,
* You should get away while you still have a chance
* But instead something in you persists and you say:
* “Why do you think that is”
* Gojo’s hand reaches up, twirling a strand of your hair around his finger, those clear blue eyes looking straight into yours
* Your breath stutters in your chest
* You always have been weak for those eyes
* His pink lips curl up into a smile
* “Because I love you”
* And before you know what you’re doing your bending down, pressing your lips against his
* “I love you too”
Bonus:
* “You can see through it right?” You ask
* Gojo fidgets with the blindfold, honestly he was hoping for a much kinkier reason than replacing his scuffed sunglasses when you gave him the blindfold
* “It’s a little darker, but that’s not a bad thing.”
* His hair is out of his face too which is nice
* But-
* “What’s with the sudden gift?”
* It’s not exactly out of character for you to get the people you care about something, but this seems a little outside of your usual MO
* “I just felt like it” You mumble
* Now that his eyes are covered up you think he might attract a little less attention, and all his former flings probably won’t be able to recognize him
* Your eyes drift to his uniform, even in the gross pantsuit you can still tell he’s got a pretty nice body,
* But you’ll have to adjust
* Gojo sees right through your nonchalant answer, smiling that wolfish grin
* “Aw was my sweetie scared I was going to leave them?” He coos, moving ever so close
* You only turn away your face
* Gojo only grins wider
* “Honey~ you should know by now if it’s not you then I’m not interested” he sings in your ear
#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen gojo#gojo satoru x y/n#gojo satoru headcanon#gojo satoru reader insert#gojo satoru x reader#gojo satoru imagine#jujutsu kaisen imagine#jujutsu kaisen headcanon#jujutsu kaisen x reader#superhero--imagines
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